Trendy Funny Quotes

  • The worst part about being drunk and seeing double is when you realize it’s just one slice of pizza.
  • Imagine the carnage at an IKEA team building event.
  • I made coffee and carried it to the couch. I’ve done everything I had planned for this Sunday.
  • Hey, we’re calling off the search party. We found a different guy out there we like more.
  • Adulting in 3 words: it’s always something.
  • Forget the alarm clock. Just give me the smell of bacon and coffee.