funny backyard quotes - Wordgag

I’ve reached the age where I just bought a bird bath for my backyard.

May 28, 2026

Everyone’s “the nicest guy ever” until the cops are in their backyard digging up several bodies.

May 27, 2026

People who wear jeans for fun around their house have bodies buried in their backyard.

May 25, 2026

I like to keep my wife guessing by walking around the backyard carrying a ladder and a chainsaw.

May 25, 2026

I like to scan my backyard every hour with a high power flashlight to let my neighbors know I won’t tolerate any weirdness around here.

May 23, 2026

I try to shoot all of my garbage into outer space, but usually it just lands in my neighbor’s backyard.

May 23, 2026

I’m ready for a new relationship. My past is buried in the backyard, to fertilize the tomatoes.

May 21, 2026

I just finished cleaning the house for Thanksgiving, so if you’re looking for my family they’ll be in the backyard until Thursday.

May 20, 2026