18 funny finished quotes - Wordgag

Not to brag, but I finished an entire book in one sitting. I’m going to need some new crayons.

May 21, 2026

My boss just left which means I have finished all of my work for the day.

May 21, 2026

I just finished cleaning the house for Thanksgiving, so if you’re looking for my family they’ll be in the backyard until Thursday.

May 20, 2026

I’m almost finished reading your tweet. Love it so far.

May 19, 2026

Hello, hi. Don’t invite me anywhere until next year. The money is finished. Regards.

May 19, 2026

Accept the truth that a clean kitchen and finished laundry are just myths. Embrace the chaos and find your inner calm.

May 19, 2026

They said, “Enjoy your money because life is short.” Now my money is finished, but I’m still alive.

May 19, 2026

The agony of thinking you’re finished doing the dishes, only to turn around and, to your horror, the pot.

Mar 30, 2026

Yes, my date did get up and leave during dinner, but luckily she hadn’t finished her food.

Mar 30, 2026

Monday? But, I wasn’t even finished with Saturday yet.

Mar 29, 2026

Doing nothing is very hard to do. You never know when you’re finished.

Mar 28, 2026

I don’t hate you, but I hope you run out of hot water before you’re finished your shower.

Mar 28, 2026

When you have finished reading this funny quote, you will be a little closer to death than before.

Mar 27, 2026

If you saw me licking the plate after the charcuterie was finished, no you didn’t.

Mar 26, 2026

My husband accidentally locked himself out of the house, and I didn’t hear him knocking until I finished eating the rest of his cheesecake. So weird.

Mar 26, 2026

Anytime someone throws a Great Gatsby themed party, I have to assume they never finished the book.

Mar 25, 2026

By the time my CVS receipt finished printing, I was eligible for another prescription refill.

Mar 25, 2026

You ran a half marathon? That’s really cool, I’ve almost finished a bunch of things, too.

Mar 25, 2026