I lied, there is no sex. You’re helping me repot plants.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has copied:

Don’t pretend to be someone you’re not. It will never bring you true happiness or fulfillment. Also, it’s a felony.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has copied:

Always do sober what you said you’d do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has viewed:

I would do absolutely anything to get 8 hours of sleep, except for going to bed 8 hours before I need to wake up.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has shared:

We’re all in the billionaire submarine now.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has bookmarked:

Stress in private, complain on Twitter, happy in public.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

As it turns out, the only way to avoid work stress is not going.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has downloaded:

Having a girlfriend is insane because you can literally go to touch them, and they will let you.