Trendy Funny Quotes

  • I just finally discovered what’s wrong with my brain: on the left side there is nothing right and on the right side, there is nothing left.
  • I see 1000 girls. I know 100 girls. I talk to 10 girls. I love 1 girl. And she doesn’t love me back.
  • I could never work in an aquarium. I would have a penguin under my shirt at the end of the shift.
  • My retirement plan is 100% contingent on me finding a buried treasure at some point.
  • Sorry for the things I said when I thought you weren’t listening.
  • “Left alone” would have been the right answer as a child to the question of what I wanted to be when I grew up.