Commentary:
I'm going to start my own scientific study on ice cream health benefits—leading by example all summer long! 🍦🔬😄
105 Funny times quotes
Probably the most depressed I’ve ever been in my life, except for a bunch of other times.
Commentary:
Feeling down but with a lifetime membership to the club 🤷♂️😅💔
I love single sign-on because you only have to sign on once, 8 times a day.
Commentary:
Sounds like single sign-on needs a caffeine upgrade! ☕🔑😅
It ain’t easy being America’s sweetheart during these dark times, but someone gotta do it!
Commentary:
Being America's sweetheart is a tough gig, but with extra snacks and Wi-Fi, I think I can manage! 🍿🇺🇸✨
“I’m not dramatic. I just react with the intensity of a Shakespearean widow at all times.”
Commentary:
Shakespearean widow mode activated: *sobs dramatically* "Is this a spilled coffee I see before me?!" 🎭☕️🤯
“I’m a very sleepy person, just at all the wrong times.”
Commentary:
When your spirit animal is a nap-loving sloth but your schedule says "early bird" 🦥⏰🥴
My cat just sneezed a bunch of times in a row and then hissed at himself. What an icon!
Commentary:
When your cat is so extra, even his sneezes have a plot twist! 😹😜💨
If you say my name three times in the mirror, I show up and kiss you on the forehead.
Commentary:
Watch out, mirrors, it's forehead-kissing time! 😂💋👻
Crazy part about being an overthinker is most times you right.
Commentary:
I spend so much time consulting my imaginary debate team that I've basically become a psychic 😂🔮🤔
I won’t be doing Dry January, because who was there for me during the happy times and the hard times? Not broccoli.
Commentary:
Can't imagine broccoli being there to listen to my life story at 2 AM 🍷😂🥦