I tried explaining crypto to my nine-year-old, and she said, “It sounds like someone is trying to sell you their imaginary friend.”

Someone from 🇫🇲 has downloaded:

I tiptoe near my medicine cabinet because I don’t want to wake my sleeping pills.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

I wonder what the part of my brain that used to store people’s phone numbers is doing now.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has viewed:

You’re no Sultan of Swing, buddy, you’re hardly a Governor of Groove.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has copied:

I forgot the word “espresso” so I asked the barista for a smaller, angrier coffee.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has shared:

Nothing humbles me faster than my phone camera accidentally turning on.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has bookmarked:

You can’t fix stupid, but you can watch it in action on Facebook every day.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has shared:

My superpower is always picking the line at the grocery store that moves the slowest.