Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"If I had $5 for every time I said up yours to someone, my butler would be rolling in it… and probably mumbling 'up yours' under his breath while polishing the silverware. 💸🤵✨"

attitude, butler, every, expression, humor, i, me, money, sarcasm, saying, someone, time, wealth, yours

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Girlfriend says because we got Chinese yesterday, we can’t get it again today. I don’t think that makes sense. They do it in China all the time.

0

4 months ago

again, China, Chinese, Chinese food, culture, eating, food, girlfriend, got, humor, i, joke, relationship, repetition, sense, think, time, today, yesterday
If we’ve got the technology to make heated car seats, then where the hell are the seats that automatically cool down in the summer? Make it happen, nerds.

0

5 months ago

car, cool, got, happen, heated, hell, seats, summer, technology, where
I’m so broke, I owe myself money.

0

2 months ago

broke, finance, humor, i, joke, money, myself, poverty, self-debt
Thought I was a minimalist, turns out I’m just broke.

0

2 months ago

broke, humor, i, irony, just, lifestyle, minimalist, money, thought
The most important meal of the day is the next one.

0

2 months ago

day, eating, food, humor, importance, meal, next, timing
Once this pandemic ends, I’m legit quitting video games and getting a girlfriend for real.

0

2 weeks ago

game, games, getting, girlfriend, humor, life, once, pandemic, quitting, real, relationship, social, social life, video, video game

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

12 shares on YouTube this month:

Oh no, we don’t go in there. That room belongs to the spiders.

90 shares on Discord this month:

I’m old enough to remember when rainbows were in black and white.

55 shares on WhatsApp this month:

My motivation and me: It’s complicated.

90 shares on X this month:

Going to a wedding really reminds me of the important things in life. Like cake.

97 shares on Slack this month:

I got confused by all the yard signs, and I think I may have voted for a realtor.

86 shares on Snapchat this month:

Satan: “Would you please stop sacrificing animals to me. I’m not running a zoo down here.”

19 shares on Reddit this month:

Reverse cowgirl so I can post selfies.

56 shares on Instagram this month:

So many spreadsheets and not once did I feel excelled.

58 shares on Instagram this month:

If we date and break up, you gotta unlearn all my lingo and cool shit that I taught you. You gotta go back to being lame.

73 shares on Snapchat this month:

The future is buffering.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

If there’s ever an alien invasion, I hope it doesn’t start while I’m asleep. I hate being woken up before my alarm.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has bookmarked:

Someone you haven’t talked to in forever will show up in your dream just to do a backflip.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

Finally got around to emptying the vegetable drawer of the fridge before something started its independence movement in there.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has shared:

I have never seen a single “when animals attack” video that I wasn’t rooting for the animal.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has shared:

I hate when the iPhone corrects ‘Omw’ to ‘On my way!’. Man, I am not that excited.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

You ever see a woman so beautiful it makes you momentarily mentally ill?

Someone from 🇱🇨 has copied:

As someone with OCD, I can’t help but respect how Pringles are just like, no, this is the order you must eat them in.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has copied:

Films and television have led me to believe that masquerade balls have a higher mortality rate than most wars.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

The note on this boxed wine says ‘Fresh up to 6 weeks after opening’. 6 weeks. Lol.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has downloaded:

The best part of the relationship is before you meet them, and you’re single.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Twitch:

If you love something, set it free. If it comes back to you, then you love a boomerang.

Shared recently on Slack:

I didn’t mean to mimic your voice, I just had to know what it felt like to sound like that.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

All quiet on the frontal lobe.

Just shared via Slack:

If you keep your AC any higher than 75, please don’t invite me to your terrarium, you lizard.

Making waves on Telegram:

On my way to Mordor. You nerds need anything?

Shared recently on Discord:

I still haven’t heard one good argument why I should stop believing in Santa.

Shared recently on Facebook:

There should be guide dogs that prevent you from making bad decisions.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Girlhood is sitting down in a boiling hot shower instead of dealing with life.

Making waves on Slack:

Nobody victim blames more than my oldest son when he’s in trouble for punching his little brother.

Seen just now on Discord:

Walking on egg shells? In this economy?

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

If i had $5 for every time I said up yours to someone, my butler would be saying it for me.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Girlfriend says because we got Chinese yesterday, we can’t get it again today. I don’t think that makes sense. They do it in China all the time.

If we’ve got the technology to make heated car seats, then where the hell are the seats that automatically cool down in the summer? Make it happen, nerds.

I’m so broke, I owe myself money.

Thought I was a minimalist, turns out I’m just broke.

The most important meal of the day is the next one.

Once this pandemic ends, I’m legit quitting video games and getting a girlfriend for real.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨