Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇴 has bookmarked:

That one friend who has a dangerously loose grasp on food safety.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has bookmarked:

Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what the hell happened.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has downloaded:

What a lot of people don’t understand about mountain climbing is that don’t do that.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has copied:

Welcome to your 40s, the best part of your day is now the heated seats in your car after a long day.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has viewed:

I tried to scream into the abyss today but got a busy signal.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

Sleep with each other, or someone else will!

Someone from 🇬🇾 has copied:

I haven’t bought 1 Christmas gift but I got 3 packages on the way for me though.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has copied:

Things went well until the evil supermarket people hid my favorite products in new places.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has downloaded:

I love all mythical creatures. Vampires, werewolves, unicorns, kids who listen.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has viewed:

The rain is pouring. So naturally it’s a good day to eat 6 donuts.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,545

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

I don’t mind being the villain in your story because you’re a clown in mine.

Trending via WeChat:

Naps are tricky. Either you wake up relaxed and refreshed, or you have a headache, a dry throat and no idea what year it is.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

“We told you to stop at 2012!” – The Mayans

Making waves on Discord:

Sorry for levitating at the end of your bed all night, I just think you’re really cute.

Spotted on Telegram:

I’m not here to offend anyone; I’m here to offend everyone.

Making waves on Twitch:

My social circle is so small that when the phone rings, I know it’s scammers.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Some people shop for designer heels. I shop for nonstop flight deals.

Making waves on Reddit:

According to a recent study, women who are a little overweight live longer than men who mention it.

Just landed via TikTok:

Every morning I announce that Im going for a jog, but then I don’t go. It’s a running gag.

Going viral on Telegram:

“Nah.” – everyone with an office job, from the Monday after Thanksgiving until January 2nd.

I’m going to start reading books again, as soon as I finish the internet.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Finishing the internet is a great warm-up for tackling those never-ending book stacks! 📚😂🔍

again, book, books, distraction, finish, going, humor, i, internet, procrastination, reading, soon, start

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Being sober would be a lot easier if I liked myself.

0

2 months ago

addiction, being, easier, humor, i, lot, myself, reflection, self-acceptance, self-esteem, sober, struggle
Being shy is so annoying. Why is my chest hurting me, because I need to speak in public?

0

2 months ago

annoying, anxiety, being, chest, chest pain, discomfort, fear, i, me, need, nervousness, pain, public, public speaking, shy, shyness, speak, speaking, why
Forget sexy talk. I want breakfast talk. Describe those waffles to me nice and slow.

0

2 months ago

breakfast, conversation, date, describe, food, food conversation, forget, humor, i, me, nice, sexy, sexy talk, slow, slow talk, talk, waffles, want
It’s way too easy to lie online. I was just telling Beyoncé about that the other day.

0

2 months ago

Beyoncé, day, deception, digital, digital deception, easy, humor, humor quote, i, identity, internet, internet humor, internet joke, joke, just, lie, lying, media, online, online identity, online lying, social, social media, telling, too
I feel like an adult spelling bee would humble a lot of us.

0

2 months ago

adult, bee, challenge, competition, feel, humble, humor, i, literacy, lot, spelling, spelling bee, us
The urge to buy people gifts they’ve mentioned they liked once.

0

2 months ago

buy, gift, gifts, liked, mention, once, people, urge

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

39 shares on Instagram this month:

You should leave your comfort zone and come to mine instead.

70 shares on Messenger this month:

Website: We use cookies to improve performance. Me: Same.

79 shares on Facebook this month:

Having a cat is like having a roommate that doesn’t want to hang out and never intends on being friends.

30 shares on Threads this month:

All soups are gazpacho if you’re lazy enough.

85 shares on Slack this month:

When I moved into my new igloo, my friends threw me a surprise housewarming party. Now I’m homeless.

58 shares on YouTube this month:

Let’s call it a year. I’ve had enough. Merry Christmas, y’all.

99 shares on WhatsApp this month:

What no one tells you about having kids is that within a few years you’re in possession of a lot of teeth that you have no idea what to do with.

90 shares on Discord this month:

The cheapest way to fly is off the handle.

31 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’m not asking for a lot, I just want someone down to earth that’s gonna touch me all over like my shower curtain does.

10 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Does running away from my problems count as cardio?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇻 has viewed:

I think some outfits just aren’t meant to be worn unless you’re getting straight into a car.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has viewed:

Dearest, I beg of you, sleep properly and go for walks.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has downloaded:

Maybe the wolf from The Neverending Story still has nightmares about me, too.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

Can drunk people actually not control their actions or is it just an excuse to do some crazy stuff?

Someone from 🇹🇩 has bookmarked:

(guy who’s not even that into you) I love you.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has copied:

Earth is hard.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has copied:

I wish I could lose weight as easily as I lose my keys, phone, temper, and my mind.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has downloaded:

Does everyone’s inner monologue have a laugh track?

Someone from 🇵🇱 has shared:

Being gracefully unhinged is the only way to get through the everyday bullshit.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has downloaded:

My home security system is just a copy of my paycheck taped to my front door.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Twitch:

Why are plane tickets so expensive? You’re going that way anyway, just give me a ride.

Just shared via Twitch:

Being skinny may be nice, but chicken nuggets are even nicer.

Just landed via Threads:

Pleasing everyone, that’s impossible. Making everyone angry, piece of cake!

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Look, the problem with The Life of a Showgirl is that, for maybe the first time in her music career, Taylor Swift has nothing to say.

Going bananas on Reddit:

Phone dry, no food in the house, I keep dying in my game. I’m such a loser.

Making waves on WeChat:

I love how spring sprung and then disappeared again.

Going bananas on Instagram:

Going to the beach as a feet guy must be insane.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Eight times a day, I ask myself which object in the office will hurt me enough so that I can go home, but at the same time won’t hurt too much.

Trending via TikTok:

I called the cops on my own party, because I was ready to go to bed.

Trending via Threads:

Twitter is like group therapy but everyone’s yelling and no one’s licensed.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I’m going to start reading books again, as soon as I finish the internet.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Being sober would be a lot easier if I liked myself.

Being shy is so annoying. Why is my chest hurting me, because I need to speak in public?

Forget sexy talk. I want breakfast talk. Describe those waffles to me nice and slow.

It’s way too easy to lie online. I was just telling Beyoncé about that the other day.

I feel like an adult spelling bee would humble a lot of us.

The urge to buy people gifts they’ve mentioned they liked once.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨