Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇲 has copied:

It’s interesting growing up and learning that most adults are not smart. I had my suspicions as a kid, but I didn’t think the situation was this dire.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has viewed:

I think, therefore I am. I am, therefore I think. Therefore I am. I think.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has shared:

I need money, not feelings.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

I will never forget how to spell bananas, thanks to Gwen Stefani.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has bookmarked:

I was born tired, and I will die tired. If I ever tell you I’m not tired, I’m probably lying.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has shared:

We can’t all be underemployed creatives. Someone in the group chat needs to know what an insurance is.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has downloaded:

We always asked “where is Waldo” but never “who is Waldo hiding from”.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has bookmarked:

She took all my money, called me fat, AND stabbed me in the arm. I hate doctor appointments.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has viewed:

If my memory gets any worse, I’ll be able to plan my own surprise party.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has shared:

Parents be like “Boys are easier,” and then their daughter has to save the family from ruin.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

17 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,286

Funny Quotes Topics

17,407

Funny Quotes Images

15,286

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,402

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Messenger:

I like winter because I fundamentally understand I deserve to suffer.

Spotted on Messenger:

Don’t worry, you’ll find the lost scissors when you’ll be searching for your glasses.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I usually don’t flirt, so if I flirt with you, please cooperate.

Trending via Pinterest:

Here’s a fun activity you can do with your kids on rainy days when they have too much energy: Go shopping and leave them at home with their dad.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

Imagine you and me as cows in Switzerland, enjoying the view and saying “moo” every day.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Do goalies ever get lonely during a game?

Just shared via TikTok:

Just did several sets of some bullshit at the gym… no idea which muscles have been targeted.

Just shared via Twitch:

The cinema vibe is my favorite, you literally forget about the world for like 2-3 hours.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Why is it called “free time” when I use it to spend all my money?

Making waves on Facebook:

Your in his DMs, I’m on Etsy paying a witch to put a spell on him.

Nothing says “not interested” quite like a Restraining Order.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Remember, the best way to say 'I need my personal space' is with a good ol' Restraining Order! 🚫🔒😂"

dating, humor, interested, not interested, nothing, order, rejection, relationship, restraining, restraining order

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I need to stop saying “Oppa Gagnam Style!” to fill in awkward pauses in conversation.

0

2 months ago

anxiety, awkward, awkwardness, conversation, culture, fill, gagnam, Gagnam Style, humor, i, K-pop, need, pause, pop, pop culture, saying, self-awareness, social, social anxiety, stop, style
Blocking anyone who tries to motivate me.

0

2 months ago

anyone, attitude, blocker, blocking, humor, me, motivation, motivation blocker, sarcasm
Every job is either 8 hours of getting exposed to cancer-causing chemicals or 8 hours of staring at a Microsoft Excel sheet.

0

3 months ago

8, cancer-causing, cancer-causing chemical, chemical, chemicals, every, excel, getting, hours, humor, job, microsoft, Microsoft Excel, office, sheet, staring, work
Beer is like weed for people with jobs.

0

2 months ago

beer, humor, job, jobs, leisure, people, relaxation, relief, stress, stress relief, weed
I’m a big believer in not going to work on your birthday!

0

3 months ago

belief, big, birthday, celebration, day, day off, going, humor, work
You can generate images with your mind whenever you want. You don’t even need AI.

0

2 months ago

AI, creativity, even, generate, generation, humor, image, image generation, images, imagination, mind, need, want, whenever

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

49 shares on Threads this month:

I threw a ball for my dog. May be a little extravagant, but he looks great in a tux.

49 shares on Messenger this month:

Pouring Diet Coke directly into my gunshot wound.

48 shares on Facebook this month:

Opinions are like air fryers. Everyone’s got one and they won’t stop banging on about them.

46 shares on Twitch this month:

Lately I have the attention span of wait what?

89 shares on YouTube this month:

I speak for everyone when I say that finding the balance between watching movies, watching TV shows, and playing video games is harder than any job.

53 shares on Telegram this month:

iPhone: I’m gonna update your software tonight while you sleep. Next morning, iPhone: I couldn’t do it, bro. Just didn’t feel right. Vibe was off.

27 shares on Instagram this month:

Picking up a hitchhiker is not worth the risk of being forced to make small talk with a stranger.

55 shares on X this month:

Microdosing hell by checking the web every day.

45 shares on TikTok this month:

It’s important to fuel your body with essential nutrients, which can be found in cookies, chips, and candy.

49 shares on Pinterest this month:

When people are telling me a story about their life it often reminds me of a much better story from my life.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇸 has shared:

When intelligence meets empathy and kindness, it’s so sexy.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

I’m still repaying karmic debt from that time I was 12 and gave the middle finger to a cow at the state fair.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has bookmarked:

If you eat well and exercise, you’ll die fit.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

“This is a great weekend to clean out the garage,” according to my wife and other people who won’t be cleaning the garage.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has shared:

When you realize your punishments as a kid (stay home, take a nap, no junk food, go to bed early) are now your goals as an adult.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has viewed:

Let’s take a family trip in this beautiful weather so the kids can complain about family, trips, and beautiful weather that has no wifi.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has copied:

Me driving at night: I hope this is the road!

Someone from 🇲🇲 has copied:

Everyone loves a little silent treatment on the weekend.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

A moth flies into your face out of nowhere. You could ask him why he does that, but what would you do with the information?

Someone from 🇨🇩 has copied:

The recipe I’m making specifically says allow to cook undisturbed, and yet my whole family is standing in the kitchen.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on X:

I’m writing a book. I’ve got the page numbers done.

Trending via Telegram:

Another day on this hamster wheel to nowhere.

Spotted on Reddit:

I want whatever the people who run at 6 a.m. have.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

God forbid a girl uses shopping as her coping mechanism.

Going bananas on WeChat:

The problem with parental controls is I need my kid to help me figure out how to set them up.

Broadcasted on X:

WhatsApp calls should indicate whose internet is poor to avoid unnecessary arguments.

Spotted on X:

“I’ll worry about it next time.” Me pissing off future me.

Live now on Pinterest:

No matter how bad your day seems, just remember that someone out there has line danced to Achy Breaky Heart.

Trending via Messenger:

All these self-driving vehicles… It’s only a matter of time before we hear a country song about his truck leaving him.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Nothing says “not interested” quite like a Restraining Order.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I need to stop saying “Oppa Gagnam Style!” to fill in awkward pauses in conversation.

Blocking anyone who tries to motivate me.

Every job is either 8 hours of getting exposed to cancer-causing chemicals or 8 hours of staring at a Microsoft Excel sheet.

Beer is like weed for people with jobs.

I’m a big believer in not going to work on your birthday!

You can generate images with your mind whenever you want. You don’t even need AI.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨