Trendy Funny Quotes

  • Watermelon. The fruit that comes with a workout.
  • Not now, I’m busy doing tax crimes on my abacus.
  • Today I bought a doughnut without sprinkles. This diet thing is hard.
  • I didn’t go to the Carribean, my tan is from standing in front of the rotisserie chicken at Costco.
  • Being social sucks all my energy.
  • Now if you’ll excuse me, today’s bad decisions aren’t going to make themselves.