Wordgag 🎅

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

A fly swatter, but for close talkers.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has copied:

You’re old if you’re excited to learn how to play Mahjong.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

If I was an outlaw in the Wild West, my face would be on unwanted posters.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has downloaded:

I like work; it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has bookmarked:

I love ordering things online because when they arrive it’s like a present from me to me.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has downloaded:

You know you’re getting old when you’re entering your birth year online and you need to spin that thing like you’re on wheel of fortune.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has shared:

I come from a family of failed magicians. I have two half sisters.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has viewed:

I wish I could physically experience the inside of a lava lamp.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has bookmarked:

Wild Friday night, and by wild, I mean me and the other psychopaths at the gym.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has viewed:

Pornhub should do a wrap-up of your year like Spotify does.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

520 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,113

Funny Quotes Topics

17,264

Funny Quotes Images

15,113

Dec 25, 2025

3,965

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Pinterest:

Money saved by using public transport instead of an Uber is paid for with your time and mental health instead.

Trending via Threads:

I got my superpowers when I was bitten by a radioactive idiot.

Going bananas on Discord:

Starting conversations with short people by saying “back when I was your height…”

Just landed via Reddit:

Name something cuter than a baby in a bucket hat on the beach.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

This year should be named “things I never thought could happen”.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

Welcome to your 40s, you’re too old to sit on the floor and put furniture together.

Going viral on X:

I’m so tired. Let’s see all of the horrible things happening in the world today before I try to sleep peacefully.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

An app where you and your partner swipe left and right on restaurants until there’s a match. No talking, no negotiation. Who’s building this?

Just landed via Snapchat:

I’m too old to be jingling all the way, I’ll jingle til about five thirty.

Trending via Messenger:

Before you have kids, ask yourself: how patient am I with really stupid people?

There are two types of people in the world, those who have to go to Walmart, and those who get to go to Walmart.

2 months ago

0

There are two types of people in the world, those who have to go to Walmart, and those who get to go to Walmart.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Ah, Walmart – the great divider of mankind! 🛒 For some, it's a chore-filled expedition, a journey into the depths of consumerism. For others, it's a thrilling adventure, a chance to embrace the chaos and find hidden gems among the shelves. Which type are you? Embrace the Walmart experience, for it is a true test of character! 💸🎉

activity, choices, experience, fun, fun activity, humor, life, life choices, people, perspective, retail, retail experience, shopping, types, types of people, Walmart, world

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Hell, yes, I work out. Somebody has to support the ibuprofen industry.

0

2 months ago

exercise, fitness, hell, humor, i, ibuprofen, pain, pain relief, relief, somebody, support, work, workout, yes
People who leave the blinds closed the entire plane ride: who hurt you?

0

5 months ago

annoyance, blind, blinds, closed, flight, humor, hurt, leave, passenger, people, plane, ride, travel
I want time to sit and read, take a nap and snack. Basically, I want to be in Kindergarten.

0

2 months ago

childhood, fun, kindergarten, leisure, life, nap, read, reading, relaxation, simple, simple life, snack, time, want
I’m super lazy today. It’s like normal lazy but I’m wearing a cape.

0

2 months ago

cape, humor, lazy, procrastination, relaxation, super, today
Apparently, it’s rude to poke someone in the forehead and yell “Skip Intro” when they start talking to you.

0

1 month ago

apparently, communication, culture, forehead, humor, interaction, internet, internet culture, intro, poke, rude, rudeness, sarcasm, skip, social, social interaction, someone, start, talking, yell, yelling
The only men you can trust is ramen.

0

2 months ago

food, humor, men, ramen, relationship, trust

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

47 shares on Telegram this month:

Anything is free if you can outrun security. The more you know.

93 shares on WeChat this month:

You know where I’d like to go? Missing.

12 shares on Slack this month:

Elsa froze her entire kingdom instead of dealing with her feelings. I respect that level of avoidance.

82 shares on Threads this month:

Post beach shower is undefeated. Greatest feeling a human could experience. Throw a nap in there, and you will never touch serenity so close.

83 shares on Reddit this month:

The secret to a good marriage is that it’s all about give and take. Giving each other frequent back rubs and ordering lots of takeout.

31 shares on Discord this month:

Not gonna lie, I just assume everyone is AI now.

11 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Congress taking an entire month off in a country where most people don’t get more than 2 weeks’ vacation is awesome.

96 shares on X this month:

Tom and Jerry fooled me into thinking dogs bullied cats when it’s the opposite in reality.

53 shares on Twitch this month:

Trying to work outside on a laptop is like sunbathing on a melting ice cube.

46 shares on Discord this month:

What do you mean I overthink things (as I wonder if I hurt my dog’s feelings by liking cat videos on Instagram)?

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

19 folks are currently checking 👀

An adult is a person who makes noise when they stand up.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

My mom and all her opinions are visiting this weekend.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

My only regret is not leaving people alone the first time they moved funny.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

That song stuck in my head is “Don’t Speak”; I have no doubt in my mind.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

TVs are like, literally, the only thing that has gotten cheaper as I’ve gotten older.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Sex in the snow is wintercourse.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Welcome to social media. A person who does not understand humor will contact you shortly.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m going to sleep. Anyone want anything?

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I love my bodyguard. I would take a bullet for him.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t argue with my kids anymore. I just vacuum every surface of the living room while they’re trying to watch TV.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

520 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,113

Funny Quotes Topics

17,264

Funny Quotes Images

15,113

Updated

Dec 25, 2025

Users Online

3,693

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

If you ever find yourself mad at me, put a cape on so you can be super mad.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has shared:

Twitter is fun. You kinda just talk to yourself and sometimes someone replies.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has downloaded:

I remixed a remix, it was back to normal.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has viewed:

Sorry I’m late, my dog was sleeping in the shape of a donut and I had to take so many photos.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has downloaded:

Don’t hate me, date me!

Someone from 🇬🇾 has bookmarked:

Sometimes I wish I could turn down the volume on certain people.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has downloaded:

You don’t scare me. You’re not a parking garage that I can’t figure out how to get out of.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has downloaded:

“I’m at that stage of Christmas shopping where I start buying myself presents.”

Someone from 🇹🇲 has viewed:

Noise cancelling headphones but for when the noises are coming from inside your head.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has viewed:

I only have one wish in life… For all my dreams to come true.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Telegram:

Toothpaste sure knows how to ruin whatever you’re drinking.

Shared recently on X:

I can easily spot a wolf in sheep’s clothing but this guy was dressed like my grandmother which threw me off.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

Male barista called me “my love” yesterday and didn’t say it today… getting mixed signals and feeling really upset.

Going viral on Facebook:

They should invent a food that sounds good for dinner tonight.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

I’m just a girl standing in front of a cat who followed me to the bathroom.

Going viral on Telegram:

My step counter doesn’t judge. For him, steps to the fridge are just as valuable as a walk.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Apparently, the job interviewer doesn’t like it when your biggest weakness is beautiful Latinas.

Trending via TikTok:

I love Fleetwood Mac, but “thunder only happens when it’s raining” is just not true.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

You know what part I love about waking up? None of it. Let me sleep!

Shared recently on Snapchat:

When people give me directions and they’re like “you can’t miss it,” I’m like, “Oh, you do not know what I’m capable of.”

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