Wordgag 🎅

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇾🇪 has downloaded:

“Your password is too weak.” Just wait until you see my will to live.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

Meetings are just podcasts I didn’t choose.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has bookmarked:

Congratulations on angrily speeding past me to get to the red light first. You’re special.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has bookmarked:

Germany is now advising people to stock up on cheese and sausages. This is called the Wurst Käse scenario.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has bookmarked:

At what age do people actually meet up to play bingo? I’m ready.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has copied:

I appreciate the people that interact with me and I really appreciate the ones that don’t.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has bookmarked:

I hate when cashiers feel the need to check if my money is real. If I could make counterfeit money, I wouldn’t be at the Dollar Tree, Karen.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has copied:

I bet this email finds you silently screaming on the inside.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has bookmarked:

Apparently, when you treat someone the same way they treat you, they get offended!

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

People who pee in the shower, have you thought about peeing before you get in the shower?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

501 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,094

Funny Quotes Topics

17,246

Funny Quotes Images

15,094

Updated

Dec 22, 2025

Users Online

3,677

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Snapchat:

Losing jewelry is a different type of hurt.

Shared recently on Messenger:

January-me would not believe the life I lived this year.

Spotted on Snapchat:

I think the most financially irresponsible thing I’ve done is get my kids to like sushi.

Just landed via Reddit:

I am thick and tired.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

My car accidentally drove to a burger shop again. I hate when it does that.

Trending via Instagram:

I’m upset that my parents never got rich enough for me to become a socialist.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

I finally used a screw from the random screw collection I’ve been accumulating for 25 years, and I’ve never felt so alive.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Nothing gets my heart pumping like receiving an annoying newsletter.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

Don’t fall for me — I’ll treat you right, and you’ll get bored and cheat.

Being called ‘my love’ is probably the cutest thing, like yes, that’s me. I’m the one you love. I’m the only one you love. I’m your love. Say it again.

4 weeks ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Aww, someone call the cheese factory because this is getting extra cheesy! 🧀💕 All aboard the love train, choo choo! 🚂❤️

affection, again, being, called, compliment, cute, cutest, endearment, love, me, name, only, pet, pet name, relationship, romantic, say, thing, yes

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

You are closer to the street than you will ever be to any billionaire.

0

3 months ago

billionaire, closer, commentary, ever, humor, proximity, social, social commentary, street
I don’t procrastinate, I delegate to my future self.

0

2 months ago

delegate, future, humor, i, management, procrastinate, responsibility, self, time, time management
I’m always looking for new and exciting ways to give up.

0

1 month ago

always, exciting, give, give up, humor, looking, motivation, new, new ways, procrastination, self-improvement, ways
Lord, remove any laziness from my body and push me to my full potential the rest of this year.

0

5 months ago

body, full, humor, laziness, lord, me, motivation, potential, prayer, push, rest, self-improvement, year, year-end
Adulthood these days is just bills and running out of memory on devices.

0

5 months ago

adult, adult life, adulthood, bill, bills, days, device, devices, just, life, memory, responsibility, running, technology
Thinking of starting a true crime podcast. Gotta explain this search history somehow.

0

2 months ago

activity, crime, digital, digital footprint, explain, footprint, funny idea, history, humor, idea, online, online activity, podcast, search, search history, thinking, true, true crime

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

12 shares on Telegram this month:

This can’t be the same body that used to be able to pull all nighters.

31 shares on Reddit this month:

I’ve already picked out my sweatpants for New Year’s Eve.

17 shares on Twitch this month:

The recipe I’m making specifically says allow to cook undisturbed, and yet my whole family is standing in the kitchen.

40 shares on X this month:

Common sense is like deodorant. The people who need it most never use it.

70 shares on Telegram this month:

I’m gonna start cursing people out but with biblical phrases like I hope your crops wither and bear no fruit and the ravens eat your mustard seeds.

28 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I’m getting targeted ads about chin fat and I’m offended by the relevance.

93 shares on Instagram this month:

Girlhood is sitting down in a boiling hot shower instead of dealing with life.

93 shares on Discord this month:

Don’t forget to tell yourself more lies today.

71 shares on WhatsApp this month:

My dog sighs a lot for someone who doesn’t pay any bills.

63 shares on Facebook this month:

My cat just sneezed a bunch of times in a row and then hissed at himself. What an icon!

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇸 has shared:

Yes, I make bad decisions when I’m drunk. But I wouldn’t say that the decisions I make when I’m sober are any better.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

Beds are always the coziest when it’s time to get up and you don’t want to.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has shared:

Not a gold digger, but the other night a woman told me her grandpa owns a Christmas tree farm. That shit had me rubbing my hands like a fly.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has copied:

Getting a random boner is a bit funny. Like, what is it, boy? What do you see?

Someone from 🇺🇦 has copied:

Sorry I missed your call. I saw that you were calling and immediately threw my phone into an active volcano.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

Are cassette tapes considered classical music yet?

Someone from 🇩🇯 has bookmarked:

You ever feel awkward in Target, cause you know you belong at Walmart.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has viewed:

Today in who needs an alarm: my kid woke me up early by scream-whispering WHAT IS DUST?

Someone from 🇬🇲 has viewed:

If I’m ever murdered, feel comfort in knowing I ran my mouth until the bitter end.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has copied:

Start every phone call with “My battery is at 5%” so you can hang up whenever you want.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Discord:

Climbing Mount Everest looks super boring and dumb. You just walk uphill, are cold and at the brink of death. No thanks.

Just landed via Reddit:

I didn’t really mind the voices in my head until one of them started their own podcast.

Freshly posted on X:

I hate when people ask me, “What did you do today?” Like, buddy, listen, I woke up at noon and then it was five p.m., okay? I don’t know.

Just landed via TikTok:

What’s wrong, babe? You’ve hardly touched my mixed signals.

Trending via Twitch:

No, it’s totally fine, Grandma. Nobody else needs to use the stairs today.

Wordgag 🎅

Activity Log ✨

Being called ‘my love’ is probably the cutest thing, like yes, that’s me. I’m the one you love. I’m the only one you love. I’m your love. Say it again.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

You are closer to the street than you will ever be to any billionaire.

I don’t procrastinate, I delegate to my future self.

I’m always looking for new and exciting ways to give up.

Lord, remove any laziness from my body and push me to my full potential the rest of this year.

Adulthood these days is just bills and running out of memory on devices.

Thinking of starting a true crime podcast. Gotta explain this search history somehow.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨