Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

Offering someone food, and secretly hoping, they don’t want it.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has copied:

I’m officially at the age where I’m not upgrading my phone until it stops working.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

The only thing I gained so far this year is weight.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has bookmarked:

Me and my boys are broke, so we take turns taking pictures of one iced matcha.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has copied:

Unfortunately, it only strengthens my spirit when the summer people mourn their terrible season.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has copied:

The worst part about re-watching Home Alone is you just know Kevin’s parents bought this house for like $250K.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

Welcome to the internet, where people are confidently wrong all the time.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has viewed:

I never give second chances, just 10 and then goodbye.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has copied:

It is easier to pass a camel through the eye of a needle than it is to convince somebody online that they are wrong.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has shared:

If i had $5 for every time I said up yours to someone, my butler would be saying it for me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

356 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,625

Funny Quotes Topics

17,675

Funny Quotes Images

15,625

Updated

Jan 12, 2026

Users Online

3,241

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via X:

The great thing about having pet insurance is that while our dachshund is at the vets, they’ve given us a courtesy poodle to hang out with.

Making waves on Discord:

I’ve deleted enough tweets to know that I should never get a tattoo.

Just landed via Threads:

Light is faster than sound. That’s why people seem so bright until you hear them talk.

Just landed via TikTok:

Seriously? I came out of hibernation for this?

Shared recently on Reddit:

I don’t usually think about what I say before I say it. I prefer to think about it after I’ve said it, late at night, for the rest of my life.

Shared recently on WeChat:

My toxic trait is optimism.

Spotted on TikTok:

If it weren’t for the last minute, I’d never do anything.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

I didn’t ghost you, I saved you from me.

Breaking via Pinterest:

When there’s food around, our cat is like an adorable, fluffy shark circling round.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

Passive income? Brothers, I need massive income.

Being called ‘my love’ is probably the cutest thing, like yes, that’s me. I’m the one you love. I’m the only one you love. I’m your love. Say it again.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Aww, someone call the cheese factory because this is getting extra cheesy! 🧀💕 All aboard the love train, choo choo! 🚂❤️

affection, again, being, called, compliment, cute, cutest, endearment, love, me, name, only, pet, pet name, relationship, romantic, say, thing, yes

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

All my small talk is done with a car horn.

2 months ago

car, car horn, communication, done, driving, horn, humor, interaction, small, small talk, social, social interaction, talk
A frittata is just an omelette for people too lazy to flip things.

2 months ago

breakfast, cooking, food, frittata, humor, just, lazy, omelette, people, simplicity, things
Technology has really helped me waste my time efficiently.

2 months ago

efficiency, humor, me, technology, time, waste, wasting
I hope you catch the bouquet at my funeral.

2 months ago

bouquet, catch, celebration, event, funeral, hope, humor, i, irony
If my toddler doesn’t sleep again tonight, I’m running away into the forest.

2 months ago

again, away, exhaustion, forest, humor, insomnia, night, parenting, running, running away, sleep, tiredness, toddler, tonight
Spice up your meltdown through interpretive dance.

3 months ago

creativity, dance, fun, humor, interpretive, interpretive dance, meltdown, performance, self-expression, spice

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

38 shares on Instagram this month:

Super excited for a brand new week of hoping for the best, but expecting the worst.

58 shares on TikTok this month:

Having a crush should be considered a form of self-harm.

56 shares on WhatsApp this month:

My personal brand is being the guest at a wedding who can’t dance but puts in a noticeable effort.

68 shares on Discord this month:

Opened two gifts this morning, and they were my eyes.

51 shares on Reddit this month:

My New Year’s resolution is to procrastinate. I’Il start tomorrow.

56 shares on Discord this month:

Do you also watch porn until the end to see if they end up getting married?

13 shares on TikTok this month:

I’m gonna be the first zoomer to start dropping the ‘two thousand’ when referring to the past. “Yeah, that was back in ‘17.”

20 shares on WeChat this month:

When I’m president, I will add an additional hour between 6 and 7pm.

68 shares on WeChat this month:

Now that I got a library card, I’m moving differently.

28 shares on WeChat this month:

Chocolate doesn’t ask silly questions, chocolate understands.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇿 has viewed:

The urge to pee in the morning is so aggressive. Bro, like, chill we’re getting there. Don’t threaten to come out.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has shared:

Why the hell did they name them ‘Soldier ants’ and not ‘Combatants’?

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

Cake hits so much harder off a plastic fork.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has downloaded:

The secret to being able to buy whatever you want is not wanting much.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has downloaded:

Absolute worst time of year to have a secret family. Hands down.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

Sorry for bouncing my leg. I’m not allowed to bash my head into the walls anymore.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has copied:

Crashed my car reading a billboard that said, “Don’t text and drive.”

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

I wonder if my recorded call has ever been used for training or quality purposes.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has shared:

I’ve shouted so much sporting advice from my sofa already this summer. It’s very tiring but hopefully it’s helping.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has viewed:

Don’t get horny around me; I’m an empath.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Pinterest:

The most productive species of beaver is the Eager.

Making waves on Twitch:

I hate when people set alarms and it wakes up everybody except for them.

Spreading quickly via X:

I’m not gonna have a bad day. The day is gonna have a bad me.

Making waves on Messenger:

I have a yearning disability.

Freshly posted on Slack:

I have friends in high places (birds).

Just landed via Pinterest:

I hope your day is as nice as my ass.

Spotted on Slack:

Pretty sure the inventor of noise-canceling headphones had a young kid trying to learn an instrument.

Spotted on WeChat:

My level of sarcasm’s gotten to a point where I don’t even know if I’m kidding or not.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

If you have to remind them to give a shit, remind yourself not to.

Trending via WeChat:

Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Being called ‘my love’ is probably the cutest thing, like yes, that’s me. I’m the one you love. I’m the only one you love. I’m your love. Say it again.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

All my small talk is done with a car horn.

A frittata is just an omelette for people too lazy to flip things.

Technology has really helped me waste my time efficiently.

I hope you catch the bouquet at my funeral.

If my toddler doesn’t sleep again tonight, I’m running away into the forest.

Spice up your meltdown through interpretive dance.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨