Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇲 has downloaded:

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again because I have a terrible memory.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has copied:

If they played poker with potato chips, I’d have a gambling problem.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has shared:

May your life one day be as beautiful as you portray it on social media.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

I thought my wrinkles were finally getting smaller, but it turns out my eyes were just getting worse.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has shared:

Sometimes I miss the time when there was only one idiot per village.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has copied:

Telling your parents about your problems is like trying to put out a fire with gasoline.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

Hello, I’m a professor in a movie. I only reach the main point of my lecture right as class is ending. Then I yell at students about the reading / homework as they leave.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

240 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,833

Funny Quotes Topics

17,014

Funny Quotes Images

14,833

Updated

Dec 9, 2025

Users Online

3,890

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Twitch:

My favorite emails are the ones that say your order has shipped.

Shared recently on Reddit:

You know you got a bad haircut when she insists on giving you a $10 discount.

Just shared via Telegram:

Once you find humor in any situation, you have nothing to fear.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

The problem with expensive things is that you tend to want them.

Shared recently on Discord:

The Titanic is a great lesson of why “just the tip” can get you into a whole lot of trouble.

Every time I leave the house, I’m reminded why sweatpants exist.

5 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When comfort becomes the true fashion statement of the week 😂🩳🏆

casualwear, comfort, every, exist, fashion, house, humor, i, leave, leaving, sweatpant, sweatpants, time, why

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I only obey the traffic rules to get on other peoples’ nerves.

1 month ago

annoyance, behavior, humor, i, nerf, obey, rule, rules, traffic, traffic rule
One minute you’re young and fun, the next you’re excited about a new vacuum cleaner.

3 weeks ago

aging, change, cleaner, excited, excitement, fun, humor, minute, new, next, vacuum, vacuum cleaner, young, youth
At the beginning of a relationship, people call their partner’s odd behavior “cute little quirks”. Some years later, the police call it “motive”.

1 month ago

beginning, behavior, call, cute, cute quirk, humor, later, little, motive, odd, odd behavior, partners, people, police, quirk, quirks, relationship
I hope all of you get laid and not laid off this year. Amen.

1 month ago

amen, fun, hope, i, job, laid, laid off, relationship, wish, year
That depressing moment when you start your car to go to work and it doesn’t explode.

1 month ago

car, depressing, depression, disappointment, expectation, explode, humor, moment, start, work
Every group chat has that one person who never replies, and it’s me.

4 weeks ago

chat, communication, every, group, group chat, humor, introvert, me, media, messaging, never, participant, person, self-deprecating, silent, silent participant, social, social media, texting

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇬 has viewed:

You gotta wonder why they just don’t make all bread garlic bread.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has bookmarked:

Netflix & by yourself.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has shared:

Therapy is basically me saying, “I did a thing,” and my therapist saying, “Yay, good job!”

Someone from 🇬🇳 has copied:

Drunk me promising you anything is the equivalent of a politician giving their manifesto … it’s not gonna happen.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has downloaded:

Men be like, “Ok, you wanna know the truth,” and lie even harder.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has downloaded:

Finally got around to emptying the vegetable drawer of the fridge before something started its independence movement in there.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has downloaded:

Caught a belt loop on a door handle and got yanked back with such force that my audio is no longer in sync with my actions.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on WeChat:

Asking the waiter for her phone number and then texting her “can I have more coffee?” two minutes later.

Shared recently on WeChat:

I got my superpowers when I was bitten by a radioactive idiot.

Just landed via Threads:

If Spotify has taught me anything, it’s that I don’t know the correct lyrics to any of my favorite songs.

Making waves on Twitch:

Before I agree to the new year, I wanna read the terms and conditions.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Why is everyone against sugar? Who stood beside you when things went wrong and you were sad? It wasn’t lettuce, for sure.

Making waves on TikTok:

I accidentally take a screenshot of my phone background at least once a week.

Live now on Facebook:

Don’t let anyone tell you, you can’t do something. Show them you can’t.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Every time I leave the house, I’m reminded why sweatpants exist.

I only obey the traffic rules to get on other peoples’ nerves.

One minute you’re young and fun, the next you’re excited about a new vacuum cleaner.

At the beginning of a relationship, people call their partner’s odd behavior “cute little quirks”. Some years later, the police call it “motive”.

I hope all of you get laid and not laid off this year. Amen.

That depressing moment when you start your car to go to work and it doesn’t explode.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Time to put the stressful screen away (phone) and switch to the comfort screen (Kindle).

Wake me up when I’m rich!

“I’m so good at doing nothing. I wish I could get paid for it.”

I only sleep so my phone can get the night off.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

I get jealous when I find someone playing a song I thought only I knew.

I would flirt with you, but I’d rather seduce you with my awkwardness.

My Indian name would be “Stares at Phone All Day.”

I love admitting when I’m wrong, because it gives me a break from always being right, like finally.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

My goal in life is to not have to commit seppuku.

Always be kind. You never know who has subscriptions to your favorite streaming apps.

Sorry I missed your call 8 months ago. Is everything okay?

Parents will give you a lecture about fake friends and then get scammed by their own siblings.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Paid my mortgage so don’t ask me to come out. I’m getting my money’s worth.

Live, laugh, leftovers.

As someone who was born in August, I find the word leotard extremely offensive.

Activity Log ✨

Share Wordgag 🙏

Activity Log ✨

Every time I leave the house, I’m reminded why sweatpants exist.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I only obey the traffic rules to get on other peoples’ nerves.

One minute you’re young and fun, the next you’re excited about a new vacuum cleaner.

At the beginning of a relationship, people call their partner’s odd behavior “cute little quirks”. Some years later, the police call it “motive”.

I hope all of you get laid and not laid off this year. Amen.

That depressing moment when you start your car to go to work and it doesn’t explode.

Every group chat has that one person who never replies, and it’s me.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Share Wordgag 🙏