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Commentary:
"Having a good heart is like being the MVP of the kindness game, but sometimes you end up scoring for the wrong team! 🏀😅 Keep shining bright, even if you occasionally trip over your own halo! 👼🤦‍♂️ #GoodHeartProblems"

appearance, done, good, good heart, having, heart, irony, kindness, me, nothing, self-reflection, stupid

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Anyone who wants to learn how to be humble, feel free to talk to me. There’s nothing like learning from the best.

1 month ago
anyone, arrogance, best, comedy, confidence, feel, free, humble, humility, humor, joke, learn, learning, me, nothing, sarcasm, satire, self-deprecating, talk, wants, witty
If the zombie apocalypse happens we’re double screwed because there are millions on record as having no brain.

1 month ago
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I told you so. Kind regards, your gut feeling.

1 month ago
advice, communication, feeling, gut, gut feeling, humor, i, intuition, sarcasm, self-awareness
Here’s your daily reminder to not forget about Dre.

1 month ago
culture, daily, Dre, forget, humor, joke, music, pop, pop culture, rap, reminder
At 20, I was unstoppable; at 30, I’m just unstartable.

1 month ago
20, 30, adulthood, age, humor, i, just, life, transition, unstartable, unstoppable
On average, my daily actions demonstrate I’m probably good at something else.

1 month ago
action, actions, average, daily, daily action, else, good, humor, self-deprecation, something, something else

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Someone from 🇫🇷 has downloaded:

I wish I was a kid again so everyone would be proud of me for taking a long nap.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has downloaded:

If you’re just talking nonsense all the time and not thinking about what you’re doing, you’re either in love or at the office.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has downloaded:

Laxatives help you live up to your full pooptential.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has downloaded:

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has shared:

Making a cult with only intuitive introverts so we can all sit in silence, side-eyeing each other suspiciously.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has viewed:

How do I get someone to unknow me? I no longer want to be known by these people.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has downloaded:

Is ChatGPT down for anyone else? I’m a neurosurgeon in the middle of brain surgery.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Reddit:

Baby, we believe in God around here, I don’t care what’s trending these days.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Somebody just told me I was living the dream, I can assure you I have never dreamt of this shit right here.

Just landed via Slack:

At my age, I’m worried about tripping and falling, so I wear a helmet. I’m also worried about looking ridiculous, so I carry a skateboard.

Just shared via Facebook:

Just caught a moth and sent it back outside. Feeling like Mr. Miyagi.

Breaking via X:

Sorry I’m late, traffic is exactly how it’s been every day for the past couple years, and I was not expecting that.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

My extravagant lifestyle of paying for housing and buying groceries is really getting in the way of my ability to save money.

Live now on Pinterest:

Don’t even get into my car if you’re just gonna scream every time I hit something.

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Activity Log ✨

Having a good heart has done nothing but made me look stupid.

Anyone who wants to learn how to be humble, feel free to talk to me. There’s nothing like learning from the best.

If the zombie apocalypse happens we’re double screwed because there are millions on record as having no brain.

I told you so. Kind regards, your gut feeling.

Here’s your daily reminder to not forget about Dre.

At 20, I was unstoppable; at 30, I’m just unstartable.

On average, my daily actions demonstrate I’m probably good at something else.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Whoever salts the fries at McDonald’s needs to come do the roads.

Is it okay for me to start drinking as soon as the kids are at school, or am I just a terrible teacher?

Elevators frighten me. I take steps to avoid them.

Everyone is getting pregnant or married, and I’m back to “What’s your favorite color?“

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Any porn site that allows comments is instantly funny because, like, why is that there.

Not right now. I’m manifesting.

Vacations are expensive, but how else could you put a price tag on your kids being ungrateful in a different city.

Lord, remove any laziness from my body and push me to my full potential the rest of this year.

When the salesman from the hearing aid company calls, I stay on the line and answer every question with ‘What?’

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Not a religious man but I do say a short prayer whenever I open a gas station restroom door.

My housemates are convinced our house is haunted. I’ve lived here for 274 years and not noticed anything strange.

iPad PR is so crazy because you think you absolutely need one until you get it.

I don’t procrastinate, I delegate to my future self.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Autocorrect changed ‘are you around?’ to ‘are you aroused?’ and my buddy didn’t want to hang out today.

Relationship status: I’m the only one wearing my hoodies.

I accidentally take a screenshot of my phone background at least once a week.

The toddler refers to every baby as Baby [Name], like Baby is their formal title.

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Having a good heart has done nothing but made me look stupid.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Anyone who wants to learn how to be humble, feel free to talk to me. There’s nothing like learning from the best.

If the zombie apocalypse happens we’re double screwed because there are millions on record as having no brain.

I told you so. Kind regards, your gut feeling.

Here’s your daily reminder to not forget about Dre.

At 20, I was unstoppable; at 30, I’m just unstartable.

On average, my daily actions demonstrate I’m probably good at something else.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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