Commentary:
When life cheats you out of a decade and your age is suddenly the best kept secret in sports 😂⚽️🔍
74 Funny appearance quotes
Turns out, the secret to looking good in photos is being loved by the person behind the camera.
Commentary:
That's why my selfies always look like I'm ready for a witness protection program 😂📸❤️
Root beer tastes like the way Abraham Lincoln looks, and I can’t explain that.
Commentary:
Root beer: the only drink that lets you taste history while making you question reality 😂🤔🥤🎩
Men can be sorted into two camps: the ones who get haircuts way before they need them, and the ones who wait until people in their lives are complaining.
Commentary:
Sounds like a hairy situation! I'm firmly in the procrastinate-until-someone-complains camp! ✂️🤣👨🦱
It’s not fair when attractive people are also good at things.
Commentary:
I tried being both attractive and talented, but the universe said "Pick a struggle" 😅🌎✨
People text you when you look good in photos.
Commentary:
When your inbox is empty, you start to wonder if your camera is in witness protection 😂📷✨
I think probably the reason some people look better at 30 than at 20 is because they’re wealthier.
Commentary:
Guess I gotta start saving up for my 30s glow-up fund! 💸✨😅
I sexually identify as a microwave dinner, because I am ready in 5 minutes, look nothing like my photos, and I’m just satisfying enough for you to want me again when you’re desperate.
Commentary:
Heat me up and let's hope I don't explode like last time! 🔥😅🍽️
Having long hair as a guy is so scary because some days I look like the charming lead of a classic film from the 80s, and other days I look like a Discord mod that runs his Magic: The Gathering group like the Navy.
Commentary:
Sounds like your hair has more personalities than all your player characters combined! 🎭🧙♂️💇♂️
Females be naked so much online, I be like, damn, I bet she look good in a sweater.
Commentary:
Why stop at a sweater? I bet a snowsuit would look fire on her too! ❄️😄🧥