Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇬 has viewed:

No need for a Halloween costume this year because there’s nothing scarier than being in your mid-20s and not knowing who you are or what you want to do anymore.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has viewed:

The difference between the Olympic village and a normal village is that not everyone in the Olympic village is related to each other.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has bookmarked:

Being awake is the worst.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

The cool thing about Twitter is you’re never the craziest one.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

It’s called single sign-on because you have to do it every single time.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has copied:

My mother still has some really ugly things from the 90s. My older brother, for example.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has shared:

“I’m like Sisyphus but with dishes. Dishyphus.”

Someone from 🇱🇺 has bookmarked:

Love is in the air fryer.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has shared:

I do not like FaceTime unless we’re best friends or I’m in love with you.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has viewed:

Imagine being a bald vampire and every time you walk by a mirror your toupée is just floating.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,580

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Discord:

I was raised to be humble which I excel at cause I excel at everything.

Seen just now on Messenger:

I will unfriend, uncousin, unco-worker, unfollow, unfamily any draining soul real quick.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Used shampoo containing caffeine. My hair is already on its way to work.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Does anyone play Trivial Pursuit anymore, or did it retire with the encyclopedias?

Shared recently on Facebook:

The inventor of archery: Man, I really wanna stab that guy over there.

Trending via Facebook:

I may be sensitive, but everyone else could be a little kinder, too.

Trending via Slack:

Once you realize I’m an idiot, my posts start to make a lot more sense.

Shared recently on Slack:

It’s funny how everyone who was all about Christmas a week ago is suddenly into New Year’s now.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

One interesting thing I learned in my thirties is that you can leave a bar before it closes.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Dating now is basically choosing which red flag you’re willing to tolerate.

I set up a Nativity scene, but since baby Jesus hasn’t arrived yet, all the Wise Men are just looking down at their phones.

Witty quote about Wise Men distracted by phones while waiting for baby Jesus.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
Looks like even the Wise Men can't resist the allure of modern technology! 👶📱 Maybe they're checking for the latest star navigation app? Or perhaps they're just really big fans of baby Jesus' social media updates! 😂🌟

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Keep the laugh going 😂

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

33 shares on Messenger this month:

Clearly I’m not doing Dry January unless you mean sense of humor.

23 shares on YouTube this month:

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

32 shares on Pinterest this month:

I swear people go to Starbucks and just say random words. “Lemme get a grande iced mocha no foam quad soy hexagon vortex hypothesis with steamed ice”.

71 shares on Telegram this month:

I highly recommend having hobbies, it distracts you from falling in love unnecessarily.

83 shares on Snapchat this month:

I was a nothingburger to him, but he was an everything bagel to me…

53 shares on WeChat this month:

Taking yesterday’s bad mood on a multi-day tour.

72 shares on WeChat this month:

I wonder if BBQ thinks about me too.

14 shares on Slack this month:

I was going to cause mischief tonight, but I climbed into my bed instead.

26 shares on Instagram this month:

Buying new glasses this week, so a whole bunch of you are about to get a whole lot uglier.

90 shares on Telegram this month:

Bowling: The most fun you can have wearing someone else’s shoes.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

22 folks are currently checking 👀

All the things I like to do are either immoral, illegal, or fattening.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Sitting in an antique chair is weird, like this thing has seen so many butts.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

“I asked Grok. I asked ChatGPT.” Yeah, well, I asked my mom. She said no.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

This coffee is not coffeeing the way I need it to be coffeeing.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t disrespect me and then be the moral compass on how I respond.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s been so long since I had sex last, went jogging in flip flops just to remember the sound.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

If he doesn’t like your fruit puns, you need to let that mango.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

A garlic a day keeps people away.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Twitter is just a diary I choose to show to strangers.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

My goal for this year is just to make sure the aliens know I’m on their side.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,652

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇷 has copied:

It’s called single sign-on because you have to do it every single time.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has bookmarked:

I can’t flirt, but I’ll awkwardly giggle at everything you say.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has bookmarked:

This year has been the perfect blend between me losing my mind and having the time of my life.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has shared:

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but I think people who say ‘I don’t know who needs to hear this’ know exactly who needed to hear it.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has bookmarked:

Last night the Internet stopped working so I spent a few hours with my family. They seem like good people.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has bookmarked:

This can’t be the same body that used to be able to stay up all night.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has viewed:

My one cat vomited her dinner and then the other cat went in and started eating it. And that, my friends, is what ChatGPT is to me.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has shared:

Don’t ask me ‘how are you?’ unless you’re willing to sign an NDA.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has bookmarked:

Sharing wired earphones is a forgotten form of intimacy.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has bookmarked:

I deserve a percentage of your pay if you ever stole any swag from me.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Slack:

Dear men, my ‘biological clock’ isn’t my weakness. It’s your final deadline to prove you’re worthy.

Spotted on Slack:

Kinda lame that pretending everything is fine isn’t working.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Aliens, robots, mutant ladybugs — whoever takes over will be better than this.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Halloween is over and most people just keep on being creepy.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory.

Just landed via Slack:

Not eating the cookie I’m craving. I better wake up skinny tomorrow.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

“Seize the day!” No thank you. I will leave the day alone and hope it extends me the same courtesy.

Shared recently on Messenger:

My biggest motivation for getting out of bed in the morning is knowing that I’ll eventually be able to get back in it.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Remember when a series of unfortunate events was a book and not your life?

Going bananas on Twitch:

Normalize saying “better you than me” to people who keep complaining about everything.

© 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴