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Looks like even the Wise Men can't resist the allure of modern technology! 👶📱 Maybe they're checking for the latest star navigation app? Or perhaps they're just really big fans of baby Jesus' social media updates! 😂🌟

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that’s amore. When you swim in the sea and an eel bites your knee, that’s a moray.

1 month ago
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The idiot’s diet is just biting your tongue.

1 month ago
biting, diet, humor, idiot, idiots, just, sarcasm, tongue
Scratching the mosquito bite on my foot? Literally orgasmic. This is the kind of stuff that the government doesn’t want you to know.

1 month ago
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Raise your hand if you’ve ever tried to breathe quieter while walking up a hill so strangers didn’t call 911.

1 month ago
911, breathe, call, ever, exercise, hand, hill, quieter, raise, relatable, strangers, tried, walking
And what do we do when we are sad? “Add to cart”

1 month ago
add, add to cart, cart, coping, coping mechanism, humor, mechanism, online, online shopping, sad, sadness, shopping
Let’s lay on the couch together, play on our phones, and ignore each other, babe.

1 month ago
babe, couch, couple, everyday, everyday life, humor, ignore, lay, lazy, life, phone, phones, play, relationship, together

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇦 has downloaded:

Me drinking green tea: this is going to fix everything.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has copied:

I hate when people are outside when I’m trying to parallel park. I need some privacy.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

The sweet potato is the kindest vegetable.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has copied:

There should be significant punishments for people at the grocery store with no spatial awareness.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has viewed:

I hate when someone you love says mean things like, “It’s time to wake up.”

Someone from 🇸🇲 has shared:

April fools prank: replace all the sugar in your house with cocaine.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has copied:

My signature move is me looking for my phone that I’m currently holding in my hand.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Messenger:

I was so locked in, to the point where we were tongue-kissing with morning breath.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Sobriety: because my standards got tired of lowering themselves.

Breaking via Slack:

I never though I’d be the kind of person who wakes up early to exercise. I was right.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Nothing says sexy like a pair of sensible, silky polka dot PJs.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

The bank just called and gave me the biggest compliment, said my balance is outstanding. I really needed that today.

Live now on Twitch:

Shaking my head like an Etch a Sketch to get my thoughts right.

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I set up a Nativity scene, but since baby Jesus hasn’t arrived yet, all the Wise Men are just looking down at their phones.

When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that’s amore. When you swim in the sea and an eel bites your knee, that’s a moray.

The idiot’s diet is just biting your tongue.

Scratching the mosquito bite on my foot? Literally orgasmic. This is the kind of stuff that the government doesn’t want you to know.

Raise your hand if you’ve ever tried to breathe quieter while walking up a hill so strangers didn’t call 911.

And what do we do when we are sad? “Add to cart”

Let’s lay on the couch together, play on our phones, and ignore each other, babe.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Partying hard on this Friday night, and by partying hard, I mean laying on my bed starfish-style.

I have now spread out a blue tarpaulin in the garden. I want it to look like I have a pool on Google Maps.

Explain it to me like I’m five then do it for me like I’m one hundred.

No haunted houses for me this year. If I wanna be frightened, I’ll just look at my 401k.

Some should judge a little less and look at their lives a little more.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

And to my great-grandchildren, I leave 48,567 screenshots.

I deleted Google when I met you because the search was over.

If you’re not getting spoiled, then spoil yourself.

Thought I would mix things up today and sit in a new spot on my couch. Absolute chaos over here.

Due to inflation, you can now eat food that has been on the floor for up to 7.3 seconds.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Watched a movie on Netflix last night that was so bad, I walked out of my own house.

To horses, hay is considered both a bed and breakfast.

For my birthday, I want everyone to tell me how much they love me and why in immense detail.

Sometimes I look deep into my colleagues’ eyes to check if you really can’t see the back of their skulls.

I followed my heart. It led me to the fridge.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

The thing I hate most about my stationary bike is having to pick it up and turn it around for the return trip.

I’d like to place an order for a large kiss and an extra-long hug.

Brussels sprouts were invented by big cabbage to sell little cabbages.

If we’ve got the technology to make heated car seats, then where the hell are the seats that automatically cool down in the summer? Make it happen, nerds.

I used to be a person who couldn’t easily fall asleep, then I got divorced and now I sleep like a baby. Probably unrelated.

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I set up a Nativity scene, but since baby Jesus hasn’t arrived yet, all the Wise Men are just looking down at their phones.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that’s amore. When you swim in the sea and an eel bites your knee, that’s a moray.

The idiot’s diet is just biting your tongue.

Scratching the mosquito bite on my foot? Literally orgasmic. This is the kind of stuff that the government doesn’t want you to know.

Raise your hand if you’ve ever tried to breathe quieter while walking up a hill so strangers didn’t call 911.

And what do we do when we are sad? “Add to cart”

Let’s lay on the couch together, play on our phones, and ignore each other, babe.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

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