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Someone from 🇭🇷 has downloaded:

My dog just tracked and successfully located a folium lanceolatum, more commonly known as a leaf.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has bookmarked:

Me: what can possibly go wrong though. Anxiety: I’m glad you asked.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has viewed:

Took a bunch of Ibuprofen to keep my posts from being too inflammatory.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has bookmarked:

You better pray to whatever god you serve that this email finds you before I do.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has bookmarked:

In English we say: “You changed.” But in poetry we say: “You became a stranger wearing the face I used to love, and I am haunted by the ghost of who you were.”

Someone from 🇷🇼 has shared:

My girlfriend treats me like a god. She ignores my existence and only talks to me when she needs something.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has bookmarked:

I bet this email finds you silently screaming on the inside.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has shared:

Sitting next to you on an empty train and clicking my stopwatch every time you turn a page in your book.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has viewed:

I would just once like to feel as powerful as a toddler throwing their sippy cup whilst sitting atop their high chair.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has shared:

I think everyone should get $500 deposited into their accounts every day, just for waking up.

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15,753

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17,766

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Updated

Feb 3, 2026

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Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Instagram:

Blocking anyone who tries to motivate me.

Shared recently on Reddit:

I do not like how Netflix threatens to start the movie while I’m just tryna read the description. Like, please, you’re making me anxious.

Seen just now on Discord:

I admire the audacity of beavers, they just move to a new area and say “screw the neighbors, imma put a lake here”.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Peak delusion is believing that a paragraph will make someone treat you better.

Just landed via Slack:

I’ve never had a beer in the shower; I’m saving it for a very low moment in my life.

Live now on Instagram:

I’ve folded seven page corners of the book I’m reading. That’s 49 in dog ears.

Going viral on Pinterest:

My Saturday was going really well, until I realized it’s Sunday!

Shared recently on Threads:

Sharing wired earphones is a forgotten form of intimacy.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

You couldn’t pay me to do this year again.

Making waves on Telegram:

Christmas bonus so small you have to call your bank and ask “is it in yet?”

It’s so unrealistic for me to delete WhatsApp, but man, I’d love to do it.

3 weeks ago

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WhatsApp and I are in a toxic relationship—breaking up would be ideal, but we just keep texting 😂📱💔

delete, desire, detox, digital, digital detox, ID, love, man, me, media, messaging, social, social media, unrealistic, WhatsApp

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22 shares on Threads this month:

Sometimes it feels better not to talk. At all. About anything. To anyone.

60 shares on X this month:

Uber sends notifications like “Hey, want to take an Uber right now?” No thanks, buddy. It’s more for when I need to go somewhere.

86 shares on X this month:

Showing up late with an iced coffee is not about poor time management, it’s about knowing how to make an entrance.

22 shares on Messenger this month:

They should invent a man who is being genuine when he says things to me.

70 shares on Slack this month:

I was walking near a construction site today and heard the foreman yell, “You’re doing a good job!” I know that was meant for me.

59 shares on WeChat this month:

I don’t like this new trend of old people wearing shirts of bands I listened to when I was a kid.

75 shares on Reddit this month:

Show me in the employee handbook where it says I can’t make weird noises in my cubicle.

83 shares on Facebook this month:

Some days you just feel like a hotel microwave. You’re here, but you don’t have enough power to actually do anything.

27 shares on Discord this month:

When I was a kid, there were two ways to die, natural causes and talking back to your parents.

78 shares on YouTube this month:

The difference between a hippo and a zippo is that one is really heavy and the other is a little lighter. Thank you and good night.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇿 has downloaded:

I kinda want a boyfriend but then where will I put my purse when I drive?

Someone from 🇦🇺 has downloaded:

They should invent a person for me and me only.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has viewed:

My friend and I had a running joke. She said, “Let’s do a marathon,” and then we both laughed.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has downloaded:

When I get the vibe from someone that fitting in is super important to them my first instinct is to bite them.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has bookmarked:

I remember when “disinformation” used to be called “lies.”

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

Being a woman is hard. You always want to buy something, slap someone, lose weight and eat something sweet.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has copied:

My girlfriend? You wouldn’t know her, she’s in a different data center.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has copied:

I think I’ll just sit here and waste oxygen all day.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

Going to a wedding really reminds me of the important things in life. Like cake.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

I forgot the word “espresso” so I asked the barista for a smaller, angrier coffee.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Telegram:

All the fruit flies are well-behaved near the garbage, only one is constantly nagging somewhere else because it thinks it has to discover new lands.

Just landed via Instagram:

At my age, you check a friend’s Facebook page to make sure they’re still alive before wishing them a happy birthday.

Just shared via Reddit:

I stopped experimenting in bed after the great honey disaster of 2015.

Going bananas on Instagram:

Everything’s under control. I just don’t know whose.

Spotted on Slack:

I’m sick of diarrhea. I want to livarrhea.

Just shared via X:

I’ll be home for Christmas, because that’s where I live.

Going bananas on Instagram:

Sorry I can’t help you move, my hands are in permanent air quotes.

Just landed via Pinterest:

No, I wasn’t dancing. I got harassed by a bumble bee.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

I once had a psychic girlfriend, she left me before we met.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

I can’t believe she picked her husband, her boyfriend and her other boyfriend over me.

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Activity Log ✨

It’s so unrealistic for me to delete WhatsApp, but man, I’d love to do it.

My favorite part about summer is when I get to go back inside where it’s air conditioned.

Liquor on the top shelf is so expensive because the bartender has to stand on their tippy toes to reach it.

If you wear glasses, we expect a lot from you academically, especially if your glasses have a rope.

This is no glow. This is the rage that boils inside me.

Some people should have read-only access to the internet.

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Activity Log ✨

It’s so unrealistic for me to delete WhatsApp, but man, I’d love to do it.

Keep the laugh going 😂

Dating apps aren’t working, time to start drinking beer and eating hot dogs along the first base line at a baseball game.

My favorite part about summer is when I get to go back inside where it’s air conditioned.

Liquor on the top shelf is so expensive because the bartender has to stand on their tippy toes to reach it.

If you wear glasses, we expect a lot from you academically, especially if your glasses have a rope.

This is no glow. This is the rage that boils inside me.

Some people should have read-only access to the internet.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨