Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • The most valuable breed of cow are the Cash.
  • If a tree falls on your ex in the woods and no one’s around to hear it, you should probably still get rid of the chainsaw.
  • I haven’t tried Yoga, but I bent over to pick up my keys off the floor, so I’m sure I wouldn’t like Yoga.
  • I’m going to start walking around in my yard all day in a bathrobe so my neighbors will build that privacy fence I always wanted.
  • When you get angry, take a breath and count to ten. Throw a punch at eight. Nobody expects that.
  • Lazy is such an ugly word. I prefer to call it selective participation.