Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇼 has shared:

Why read the room when you can leave the room?

Someone from 🇲🇰 has bookmarked:

I live in my own little world. But it’s ok, they know me here.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has shared:

I highly recommend getting yourself a “How can I help” partner and not a “You will be fine” partner.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has copied:

I’ve taken a long, hard look at myself. I won’t be doing that again.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has downloaded:

I never used to worry about death but now I’m terrified it will break my winning Wordle streak.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has bookmarked:

I wanna be crazy rich. I’m already crazy, so I’m half way there.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has shared:

Career anxiety hitting at random hours of the day.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has copied:

Roses are red, tacos are delicious. I use paper plates, ’cause I hate doing dishes.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has bookmarked:

My name is Bob but my friends don’t call me.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

I hated rats even before my girlfriend left me for one.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,571

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

We are the last generation of programmers who know the deadly feeling of seeing the exact problem in our code, on Stack Overflow, with 0 answers.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

OnlyFans, but it’s elderly women teaching you how to sew, knit, can food, quilt, and some solid recipes. OnlyGrans.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Don’t be boring. Create the gossip you would like to hear.

Trending via Discord:

Somebody somewhere today don’t know it’s their last day with all 10 fingers.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

Every day is a D-Day, if you’re a stutterer.

Trending via Threads:

If you’re gonna spend so much time in my head, would it kill you to tidy up a bit?

Going bananas on Discord:

According to autocorrect, my favorite Star Wars character is Bob’s Feet.

Making waves on YouTube:

Applying for jobs feels like auditioning to be enthusiastic about a blind date you haven’t even met yet.

Live now on WeChat:

People say “I would never,” then here they come nevering like they never nevered before.

Broadcasted on Slack:

On my phone, you’ll never see contacts saved as ‘babe’ or ‘love.’ I save full names—first and last—like a government office.

None of the Instagram story fonts represent me.

3 months ago

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Maybe they need a new font called "Constantly Confused" just for us! 🤔😅📚

font, fonts, humor, identity, Instagram, me, media, none, self-expression, social, social media, story

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Social Media Stars ⭐

45 shares on Slack this month:

It takes a lot of balls to golf the way I do.

58 shares on Threads this month:

My New Year’s resolution is to be less presumptuous and rude to others. I’ll bet yours is to lose weight, isn’t it?

96 shares on Reddit this month:

I wanna date someone cuter than me, but sadly I am the cutest.

14 shares on WeChat this month:

When your name is Jenn, people think it’s short for Jennifer, but it’s really short for Jennatalia.

72 shares on Discord this month:

I love the smell of freshly brewed delusions in the morning.

28 shares on Threads this month:

Why would I spend money on the zoo when I can watch my colleagues for free?

63 shares on Instagram this month:

I’m not humiliating myself here for 3 likes. 10 maybe but not 3.

94 shares on Pinterest this month:

If I’m too much for you, then go and find less.

69 shares on Instagram this month:

If you can’t handle me at my weirdest, then leave, because it gets weirder.

12 shares on Pinterest this month:

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇪 has downloaded:

I like my money where I can see it: hanging in my closet.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has viewed:

Can I get back all those naps I refused to take as a kid? I could really use them now.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has bookmarked:

I birthed my kid faster than she can put on shoes.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has shared:

Imagine how scary sharks would be if they wore necklaces made out of our teeth.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has copied:

It’s time I admit something: Sometimes, when I say good night, I don’t actually go to bed right away.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has downloaded:

I got a lot of Jedi advice for somebody who could be turned to the dark side by moderate traffic.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has viewed:

I hate that Al has now caused me to question the authenticity of cute animal videos online. I don’t even know if this baby penguin actually wore a beret to go buy a tiny baguette in Paris.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has bookmarked:

Having a crush should be considered a form of self-harm.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has downloaded:

Hope this email finds you moonwalking out of work early.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

Started from the bottom and I’m still ain’t shit.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Reddit:

I can’t believe I’m about to say this, but I finally get why people love cauliflower.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

Much like an Olympic sprinter, I also load up on carbs, exert myself for roughly two minutes, and then quit for the rest of the day.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

I went for an interview at IKEA. The manager greeted me by saying “come in, make a seat”.

Just shared via Facebook:

My family was too poor for a gene pool, so we soaked our genes in rye whiskey.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Don’t buy me flowers. A bouquet of KitKats will suffice.

Breaking via Slack:

Foo fighters still fighting foo.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

While a leaf blower is a close second, my preferred cleaner is a flamethrower.

Breaking via YouTube:

Source? It was revealed to me on a walk.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

I always set two alarms, one for “Good Intentions Me” and one for “The Real Me”

Seen just now on Telegram:

8 pm to 10 pm on a weeknight is the shortest that two hours can possibly be.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

None of the Instagram story fonts represent me.

Some say the world will end in fire. Others say in ice. Coming up next, our expert panel breaks down the arguments for each side…

When someone asks why you don’t have kids just say “dingoes”.

Had a king sized bed all to myself last night. Must be what Rose felt like on that door.

I need the youth to start reading. Even if it’s the tag on your underwear. Read it.

Everyone’s a gangster until their doorbell rings.

Social Media Stars ⭐

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

None of the Instagram story fonts represent me.

Keep the laugh going 😂

It’s not ‘drinking alone’ if you’re at work.

Some say the world will end in fire. Others say in ice. Coming up next, our expert panel breaks down the arguments for each side…

When someone asks why you don’t have kids just say “dingoes”.

Had a king sized bed all to myself last night. Must be what Rose felt like on that door.

I need the youth to start reading. Even if it’s the tag on your underwear. Read it.

Everyone’s a gangster until their doorbell rings.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨