Restaurants: put your phone down, live in the moment. Also, scan our QR code and browse our menu.

Restaurants: put your phone down, live in the moment. Also, scan our QR code and browse our menu.

Commentary:
“Restaurants be like: ‘Live in the moment…but first, here’s our QR code for all the digital fun!’ 📱🍽️ #IronyAlert #ModernDining”

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • How quickly family vacations go from “Omg, we only have 4 days left” to “Omg, we still have 4 days left”

    Commentary:
    “Ah, the classic time warp of family vacations – where days feel like minutes until suddenly they start to feel like eons. It’s the ultimate test of patience and togetherness, all wrapped up in a sunscreen-scented package. Just remember, every day is a new opportunity for more sunscreen mishaps and memorable family moments!”

  • My thighs are bigger than my chances in life.

    Commentary:
    “Who needs big chances when you’ve got big thighs? 💁‍♀️ Embrace your thunder thighs and conquer the world – one squat at a time! 🏋️‍♀️💪 #ThighsOfSteel #LifeGoals”

  • I want time to sit and read, take a nap and snack. Basically, I want to be in Kindergarten.

    Commentary:
    “Who knew the key to a stress-free life was to simply revert back to Kindergarten? No bills, no responsibilities, just pure bliss of naps and snacks. Sign me up for the Kindergarten life ASAP!”

  • Shoutout to the friends that still like me. All two of you.

    Commentary:
    “Big shoutout to my exclusive fan club, population: 2! 🎉 Just me and my other personality, keeping the friendship strong! 🤝 Who needs a squad when you have a dynamic duo, am I right? 😂 #FriendshipGoals”

  • Why do men always think “looking for fun” means sex? Wat if I want us to draw?

    Commentary:
    “Maybe they need to rethink their definition of fun 🎨 Drawing can lead to great masterpieces and deep conversations… and it won’t leave you with any awkward paint stains 😉 #ArtOverRomance”

  • Feminism convinced women they could have it all. Now they’re 40, independent, and crying in a very nice but empty apartment.

    Commentary:
    Oh, the cruel irony of adulting hitting harder than expected! 🙈💁‍♀️ Who knew that “having it all” also meant having all the bills, responsibilities, and empty wine bottles? 🍷🏠 Hang in there, ladies – at least the apartment is nice! 💪😂 #AdultingAtItsFinest