Screen time on your computer feels like healthy screen time, screen time on your phone feels like evil screen time.

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As a parent of a teenage daughter, I would like to formally apologize to my parents for my tube-top and low-rise jeans era.

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Weird. I’m the only one naked at this gender reveal party.

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Men used to smoke Marlboros. Now they cry when they lose their strawberry cheesecake vape.

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So deep in her Instagram story, I accidentally liked an ad for a Toyota.

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People pleasing doesn’t go well with my black attire.

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As highly as it’s esteemed, the Mayo Clinic still sounds like the place sick sandwiches go to get better.

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“Try it all before you die” is always drugs and sex, never quantum physics.