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Commentary:
"Twitter: where your thoughts can soar freely, but your ego might take a tumble! 🕊️💸 Just remember, the keyboard is mightier than the sword… and sometimes, your balance too! 🤪💻"

activity, back, bug, cost, flip, humor, media, minutes, money, should, social, social media, tweeting

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I become someone I don’t recognize when I play Monopoly.

0

2 months ago

board, board game, competition, game, humor, i, Monopoly, personality, play, someone, transformation
You sound smart. You some kinda ‘ologist?

0

2 months ago

conversation, humor, ologist, sarcasm, smart, sound, wit
This quote is invisible. Only people who masturbate a lot can read it.

0

2 months ago

humor, invisible, masturbate, people, read
Why is everyone’s main goal to get married and have kids? Like, don’t you guys want to do drugs in foreign countries?

0

2 months ago

adventure, choice, country, drug, drugs, foreign, foreign country, goal, guys, humor, kid, kids, life, life choice, main, marriage, married, travel, want, why
Autocorrect is like a tiny person inside your phone that sometimes gets drunk and says the dumbest things.

0

2 months ago

autocorrect, drunk, dumb, dumb thing, humor, person, phone, technology, thing, tiny, tiny person
One time, when I was a kid, I fell off my bike and hit my head so hard, I was briefly able to communicate with bees.

0

2 months ago

able, bee, bike, childhood, communicate, fall, hard, head, hit, i, kid, time

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

55 shares on WeChat this month:

I bet she doesn’t even laugh at your dumb jokes the fake way I did.

93 shares on Pinterest this month:

Maybe we should put monkeys in charge for a while just to see how it goes.

20 shares on Telegram this month:

Everything will kill you so pick something fun.

34 shares on Telegram this month:

Would pay $10 a month for Summer Premium Package without wasps.

62 shares on Reddit this month:

I keep my eyes in great shape by rolling them constantly.

98 shares on Twitch this month:

My kid asked where babies come from and I said everywhere, man, they’re worldwide.

80 shares on WeChat this month:

Hi. I didn’t mean to “like” your tweet. I was scraping dried jelly off my phone.

72 shares on Pinterest this month:

I’m slowly becoming an adult. Please make it stop.

67 shares on X this month:

I am thinking of watching a movie with my boyfriend. Can anyone recommend a good boyfriend?

73 shares on YouTube this month:

If you ever get locked out of your house, talk calmly to the lock. We all know that communication is the key.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇼 has downloaded:

She wanted me to impress her in the bedroom, so I showed her my organized sock drawer and my fresh matching bedding.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has viewed:

Experts say you can make any statement sound more credible by adding ‘experts say’ at the beginning.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has bookmarked:

If we start dating now, we could be arguing on a road trip by August.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has copied:

Confession: If you’ve ever been in a revolving door with me, I was only pretending to push.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has viewed:

Got a job rejection, saw the company post the same job again, so I applied again. I decide when we’re done.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has viewed:

Did you seriously just pique my interest?

Someone from 🇩🇪 has bookmarked:

Commenting “humiliation ritual” on a pic of my friend out with his family.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has copied:

My nephew asks so many questions that Alexa just told him it’s okay to bathe with the toaster.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has copied:

Your birthday as an adult mainly consists of texting back ‘Thanks!’ to people you haven’t talked to in 5 years.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has bookmarked:

Today, I used a wire I’ve kept in my box of cables since 2011. Please applaud.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Discord:

As soon as the sun comes back out, I want a beer. It’s science.

Seen just now on X:

I don’t know which is worse, people stealing your jokes or people not stealing your jokes.

Going bananas on Reddit:

No need for a Halloween costume this year because there’s nothing scarier than being in your mid-20s and not knowing who you are or what you want to do anymore.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

My boyfriend moved in with me straight from Hotel Mama. In a way, I’m now a single parent.

Just landed via Twitch:

Church should be less preachy and more eat-y.

Trending via Telegram:

Why is sleeping at night so hard, but sleeping in the morning is like drifting away on a soft, fluffy cloud while Adele sings you a lullaby?

Shared recently on YouTube:

I prefer my weighted blanket in human form.

Going viral on Instagram:

My superpower? I can look you right in the eyes while you’re talking and not hear a single word you said.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Falling off academically is worse than a heartbreak.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

Men be like “I hate drama,” and then have love triangles, secret babies, a wife, side chick, ex that’s still around, breadcrumbs, and unhealed trauma.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Tweeting shouldn’t cost money but it should flip you on your back like a bug for 15 minutes.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I become someone I don’t recognize when I play Monopoly.

You sound smart. You some kinda ‘ologist?

This quote is invisible. Only people who masturbate a lot can read it.

Why is everyone’s main goal to get married and have kids? Like, don’t you guys want to do drugs in foreign countries?

Autocorrect is like a tiny person inside your phone that sometimes gets drunk and says the dumbest things.

One time, when I was a kid, I fell off my bike and hit my head so hard, I was briefly able to communicate with bees.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨