When someone touches my phone, I automatically turn into a ninja.

When someone touches my phone, I automatically turn into a ninja.

Commentary:
“Handle my phone with caution, or I might just ninja chop your hand away! 📱💥🥋 #PhoneProtectionNinja”

Advertisement

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • I don’t wanna brag, but I’ve been told I’m micro-management material.

    Commentary:
    Well, well, look at you, the micro-management maestro in the making! 🕵️‍♂️ Who needs macro plans when you’ve got a knack for the micro details, right? 😜 Own it, flaunt it, and remember…with great micromanagement skills comes great responsibility! 💼 #MicromanagementMaterial

  • Great news everyone! The priest who took my confession is expected to make a full recovery.

    Commentary:
    🎉🙏 “Good news, folks! Looks like divine intervention was at play because the priest who listened to all my sins is on the mend! Maybe my confessions weren’t as bad as I thought after all…😅”

  • You ever met someone so dumb you gotta take a deep breath before responding to them?

    Commentary:
    Oh, absolutely! 🤦‍♂️ It’s like preparing yourself for a mental gymnastics routine every time they speak! 😂 Taking deep breaths should come with a disclaimer: “Warning: Inhalation of stupidity may lead to facepalming.” 🤣

  • I am so tired ever my tiredness is tired.

    Commentary:
    “Feeling so tired that even your exhaustion needs a nap? 💤 Sounds like you’re on the fast track to becoming a professional sleeper! 😂💤”

  • Just paid my bills, so don’t ask me to come out. I’m at home getting my money’s worth.

    Commentary:
    “Sorry, can’t join you tonight! My wallet just performed a disappearing act and I’m having a cozy date with my couch and Netflix. Priorities, you know? 🤑🏡 #HomebodyForLife”

  • I think during winter we should also get to work less hours in a day, just like the sun.

    Commentary:
    “Agreed, let’s convince our bosses that our productivity is directly tied to the sun’s work schedule 🌞 Less sunlight, less work, right? Who’s with me? 🤔 #WinterWorkHours”