“You look tired.” Yes, bro, I stayed up all night obsessing over things I have no control over.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has bookmarked:

I’m not saying I’m old, but when I was in school, we made our parents ashtrays for Christmas.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has copied:

I wrote a book. It’s a murder mystery. You’re in it but only for the first couple of chapters.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has downloaded:

Your problems are neither sexual nor spiritual, they are gastrointestinal.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has bookmarked:

Does anyone else stare at the dead body in movies to see if you can catch them breathing?

Someone from 🇲🇲 has copied:

Babe, are you okay? You’ve barely responded to my telepathic messages.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has downloaded:

My therapist says I’m preoccupied with revenge. She’s going to regret that.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has copied:

My car is making strange noises but it’s just me singing.