Someone from 🇧🇦 has downloaded:

Home is where you can look ugly and enjoy it.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has shared:

Nobody rots in bed like I do.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has bookmarked:

Okay, seen enough, someone put a blanket over my cage.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

Just did my best horse impression and the doctor still won’t give me ketamine.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has copied:

Nothing angers me more than tall ghosts in horror movies. No one born in 1782 was that tall. Do your research, screenwriters.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has shared:

That annoying moment when you’re texting someone and autocorrect decides to join the conversation.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

If Keith Richards survived the ’70s, the ’80s, and 1.2 million Marlboros, I can probably survive anything.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has downloaded:

Of course I look tired, it’s hard pretending to be awake.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has shared:

If it was really a smart phone, it would have recognize that it was an ignored call, not missed.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

If you say “awesome sauce” on a first date, you’ll still have that lucky condom in your wallet tomorrow.