Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇶 has viewed:

I tried a onesome before, but I started catching feelings.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

Fish must think we look so weird with both eyes on the front of our face.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

Your annoying online persona has captured my heart.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

After a month away and enough pasta to scare an Italian grandma, I can confirm: too much Parmesan? Never heard of her.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has bookmarked:

What is your favorite movie where Tom Cruise runs really fast?

Someone from 🇦🇲 has shared:

McDonald’s only giving me 9 Chicken Nuggets instead of 10 is how my villain origin story began.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

Got fired from my job at the zoo because I kept trying to wax the turtles.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

240 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,833

Funny Quotes Topics

17,014

Funny Quotes Images

14,833

Updated

Dec 9, 2025

Users Online

3,984

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Threads:

Embattled politicians resign saying they want to spend more time with their families. Do their families get a say in this?

Spotted on Telegram:

Laziness is the mother of all bad habits, but ultimately she is a mother, and we should respect her.

Spotted on X:

Cleaning out your camera roll is like the biggest chore ever.

Seen just now on X:

Sorry for being late, I was enjoying my last few minutes of not being here.

Spotted on Messenger:

When does hibernation actually begin? I wanna take part this year.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Someone needs to press pause on this weekend.

Spotted on Messenger:

It’s Friday. I ran out of small talk on Tuesday. Please leave me alone.

Flirting is easy until it’s someone you actually like.

5 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When you like someone, flirting suddenly turns into a game of charades, and you're losing 🎭🙈

actually, attraction, communication, crush, dating, easy, flirting, humor, love, nervousness, relationship, someone

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Me waking up: wow, I can’t wait to go to sleep tonight.

1 month ago

anticipation, daily, daily life, humor, life, me, night, relatable, sleep, wait, waking, waking up
When I was a kid I thought shrimp cocktails had alcohol in them and I thought it was such a weird way to get drunk.

1 month ago

alcohol, childhood, cocktail, drunk, humor, i, kid, misunderstanding, shrimp, thought, weird
My dad called my philosophy degree a “license for unemployment.”

4 weeks ago

dad, degree, education, family, humor, joke, license, philosophy, sarcasm, unemployment
I don’t know what millennial needs to hear this, but throw away the box your phone came in. You don’t need it. You will never need it.

4 months ago

advice, away, box, came, hear, humor, i, know, millennial, need, needs, never, phone, throw, throw away
LinkedIn: where you desperately hope that one idiot you had a drink with six years ago can somehow help get you a job.

1 month ago

ago, desperation, drink, help, hope, humor, idiot, job, LinkedIn, networking, past, six, where
You can’t be everyone’s cup of tea, let them sip on their own bland brew.

1 month ago

bland, bland brew, brew, cup, cup of tea, humor, individuality, let, own, preference, self-acceptance, tea, uniqueness

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

My favorite part about standing in line is watching the other lines move more quickly.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has viewed:

Skin coloured leggings should be illegal.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has shared:

No one declines an incoming call faster than a 3-year-old watching YouTube.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has bookmarked:

An orgasm before bed is nature’s strongest sleep aid.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has copied:

A cheat code to adulting is to always have something to look forward to, no matter how small or big.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has shared:

They should invent a way to delete other people’s posts.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has shared:

My least controversial opinion is that IKEA should have a bar. I think we were meant to consume three beers and then purchase a Gjörfbunkle.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on YouTube:

I don’t have a new year resolution, you don’t need that when you’re perfect.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

Dogs are like chicken nuggets; every time I see one, I want it.

Shared recently on Slack:

Twitter needs a button that’s “bring back that tweet I was just starting to read before you automatically refreshed.”

Just landed via Messenger:

The good old days, when you didn’t have to charge your watch and it didn’t constantly remind you how fat you were.

Spotted on Slack:

I remember when asking someone if they were on X meant something completely different.

Seen just now on Facebook:

The children seemed disappointed when I told them the best part about being an adult is going to bed early.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Don’t study, get slutty!

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Flirting is easy until it’s someone you actually like.

Me waking up: wow, I can’t wait to go to sleep tonight.

When I was a kid I thought shrimp cocktails had alcohol in them and I thought it was such a weird way to get drunk.

My dad called my philosophy degree a “license for unemployment.”

I don’t know what millennial needs to hear this, but throw away the box your phone came in. You don’t need it. You will never need it.

LinkedIn: where you desperately hope that one idiot you had a drink with six years ago can somehow help get you a job.

You can’t be everyone’s cup of tea, let them sip on their own bland brew.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

I’m in favor of sticking an “out of order” sign on some people’s foreheads. As a warning.

In six days God created heaven and earth. On the seventh day, in the interests of balance, the BBC interviewed Satan.

I started at the bottom and worked my way down.

I’m not accepting the bare minimum; I need you to shake it to the max.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

I’m at the stage in life where I stay out of arguments. Even if you say 1+1=5, you’re right. Have fun.

My only goal in life is to never end up on a Netflix documentary.

Big fan of calling artists their first name and then the band name as their last name.

If you ever feel like a failure, just remember, Domino’s tried to open pizza chains in Italy.

We really grew up in the best era to be a kid, and the worst era to be an adult.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

There are two quantities of popcorn: not enough and what have I done

If these walls could talk, they would definitely say “Wow, this guy really does add cheese to everything after all!”

I have to work because the baby is expensive. (I’m the baby.)

One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Why did they call it K-pop and not Seoul music?

Your future doctor is using ChatGPT to pass med school so you better start eating healthy.

Is ChatGPT down for anyone else? I’m a cardiac surgeon in the middle of heart surgery.

Sports are better when you have hate in your heart.

The worst part about being drunk and seeing double is when you realize it’s just one slice of pizza.

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Flirting is easy until it’s someone you actually like.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Me waking up: wow, I can’t wait to go to sleep tonight.

When I was a kid I thought shrimp cocktails had alcohol in them and I thought it was such a weird way to get drunk.

My dad called my philosophy degree a “license for unemployment.”

I don’t know what millennial needs to hear this, but throw away the box your phone came in. You don’t need it. You will never need it.

LinkedIn: where you desperately hope that one idiot you had a drink with six years ago can somehow help get you a job.

You can’t be everyone’s cup of tea, let them sip on their own bland brew.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Share Wordgag 🙏