I wish I could join, but Iā€™m busy plotting revenge because my kids laughed when I showed them I can shake it better than Shakira.

I wish I could join, but Iā€™m busy plotting revenge because my kids laughed when I showed them I can shake it better than Shakira.

Commentary:
“Watch out, Shakira! 😂 Looks like there’s a new hip-shaker in town, determined to prove those kids wrong! 💃👀 Revenge is a dish best served with a side of sassy dance moves! 🕺😆”

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Trending Funny Quotes šŸ‘‡

  • What do people do with all the extra time they save by writing ā€˜kā€™ instead of ā€˜okā€™?

    Commentary:
    “Seriously! 🤔 Do they use it to meticulously arrange their sock drawers, contemplate the mysteries of the universe, or perhaps master the art of the perfect cup of tea? ☕️ The possibilities are endless when you’re living life in the fast lane of ‘k‘! 😄 #TimeSavers”

  • Roman soldiers are all like ā€œIā€™m going to fight you in this short yet tasteful leather skirt.ā€

    Commentary:
    Well, who says you can’t conquer an empire in style? 👠🛡️ Those Roman soldiers sure knew how to make a statement on the battlefield! Fashion-forward warriors, bringing a whole new meaning to the term “fighting in style.” 💃💪 Just imagine their enemies’ reactions when they showed up in those short, yet tasteful leather skirts! 🤣 #FashionablyFierce #RomanChic

  • Used dark mode so much that I became physically repulsed when I see a white screen.

    Commentary:
    🌑💡 “When dark mode is life, a sudden burst of brightness feels like a solar eclipse on your retinas! 🕶️😂 Who needs sunglasses when you’ve got a monitor set to ‘night mode’ all day, every day? Embrace the darkness, it’s where the cool kids are at! 😎🌚”

  • Establish dominance at work by telling your coworkers they look tired before they get a chance to say it to you.

    Commentary:
    “Want to assert your authority at work? Simply beat your coworkers to the punch by pointing out their sleepy eyes before they can even mention yours. It’s all about that pre-emptive strike, folks! 💪😏 #OfficePowerMoves”

  • Stranger: Your children are angels. Me: So was the devil.

    Commentary:
    “Stranger: Your children are angels. 👼 Me: So was the devil. 😈 Who says innocence can’t be mischievous!?”

  • Welcome to your 40s, you now respond to every younger person telling you their age with ā€œJesus Christā€.

    Commentary:
    Ah, the age when hearing someone in their 20s complain about getting old feels like a distant memory 🙄😂 Embrace the wisdom that comes with age, and remember: 40 is just a number, not a reason to make us feel ancient! 🎉 #AgeIsJustANumber #FeelingYoungAtHeart