If you think Dry January is hard, wait until you try Abstinence August. Posted onApr 1, 2026 by slickboy in Funny Quotes 💾 Save Image Commentary:Abstinence August? Sounds like my calendar needs a vacation 🚫🍹🤦♂️ Related funny posts 🤝 Don’t blame the holidays, you were already overweight in August. As someone who was born in August, I find the word leotard extremely offensive. There’s a weird kind of grief that comes with late August, and I can’t explain it. I haven’t lost my virginity because I never lose. Goodbye, August, don’t let the door hit you on the way out.