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Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

Five out of six people find Russian Roulette to be a safe activity.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has bookmarked:

Just bought 4 pounds of cherries like I’m in some math problem.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has bookmarked:

When you drink red wine from a cup, it looks like fruit tea and you are also admired by others for your healthy lifestyle.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

I don’t care if it’s AI or an immigrant, I desperately need someone to take my job, it’s killing me.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has copied:

Nicole Kidman being in a film called Babygirl is actually perfect cause it’s like another version of her last name.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

Dudes be named Will but won’t.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

“I’m not concerned about Netflix buying Warner Brothers. None of this will matter once we evolve gills and start living underwater.”

Someone from 🇦🇺 has downloaded:

I’m a yapper. I’m a napper. I’m a midnight snacker.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

Being alone is my favourite way of being.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has copied:

Someone at work had a 25-year anniversary, and it took everything in me not to say she’s been working longer than I’ve been alive.

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Updated

Feb 3, 2026

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Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Snapchat:

Childbirth seems like an awful lot of work for an already saturated market.

Trending via Discord:

I’m pretty sure emojis were invented so introverts don’t have to say anything to anyone.

Trending via Discord:

Do you guys remember when we had to share one desktop computer wіth the whole famіly?

Shared recently on Slack:

The cool side of the pillow just stole my boyfriend.

Breaking via X:

Sometimes our greatest achievement in life is being able to survive our own thoughts.

Just shared via YouTube:

I’m perfectly approachable as long as you’re carrying a plate of nachos.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

In honor of the winter solstice, I also will be cold, distant and filled with darkness.

Just landed via TikTok:

Christmas lights: the only thing bright around here besides my personality.

Just shared via TikTok:

I have poor night vision so I upgraded to LED headlights because it’s important to me to ensure nobody else can see either.

Going bananas on WeChat:

Any cults got something wild planned anytime soon? I’m trying to find the good estate sales.

If you voted for someone because “he’s not a politician”, then I hope your next colonoscopy is done by a plumber.

3 weeks ago

Funny quote highlighting political disillusionment with witty, sarcastic humor.

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Commentary:
"Guess I'll be calling a pastry chef for my next root canal! 🍰🦷😂"

colonoscopy, done, healthcare, hope, humor, i, next, plumber, politician, politics, satire, someone, surgery, voted, voting

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Social Media Stars ⭐

83 shares on WeChat this month:

How soon into a new relationship should you let her know you’re an idiot?

32 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I love asking 5 different people for advice then doing what I want.

10 shares on Reddit this month:

They invented the word metallic, because irony was already taken.

71 shares on Threads this month:

No matter how bad your day seems, just remember that someone out there has line danced to Achy Breaky Heart.

86 shares on Facebook this month:

Might mess around and reply “history will absolve me” to all work emails.

44 shares on Threads this month:

Be the nonsense you wish to see in the world.

67 shares on Pinterest this month:

There are two quantities of popcorn: not enough and what have I done

12 shares on Reddit this month:

I’m uncomfortable around tall people. What if they pick me up and put me on their shoulders?

77 shares on Reddit this month:

One night stands just make more sense for single people. Why would you need a night stand on both sides of the bed?

89 shares on Snapchat this month:

Did we do it, did we save the daylight?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇺 has bookmarked:

Holding this fart in feels like I’m pregnant with a dinosaur.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has shared:

My husband loves when we fight, and I turn it into a limited series called And Another Thing.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

I may be the reason why our kids are ugly, but you’re the reason why they’re stupid.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has bookmarked:

GTA6 should have streams and wetlands so we can work to conserve and restore them.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has downloaded:

Welcome to your 40s: it’s Saturday night so you know what that means, absolutely nothing, go to bed.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

When I like a woman, I start to gather gifts for her like a squirrel hoarding nuts.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has bookmarked:

Have you tried making guacamole about it?

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

Sure, I could keep my thoughts to myself but I can’t see “Likes” in my journal.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has shared:

I consider the second page of Google results the dark web.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has viewed:

If an alien is 60 million light years away and is watching us through a telescope, it will see dinosaurs.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Telegram:

I wish I was mysterious, but unfortunately I just can’t keep my mouth shut.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Y’all aren’t taking beautiful women to jazz clubs anymore, and that’s the problem.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Please don’t send me mixed signals, I don’t even understand the clear ones.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

If it doesn’t get a like in the first two years, I delete it.

Making waves on WeChat:

I be like, “I needed this,” and it’s just me getting drunk.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

Your call is very important to us, here’s six days of irritating music.

Trending via YouTube:

I have a date and nothing to wear. Or as Nietzsche said: If you stare into a closet long enough, the closet stares back at you.

Just landed via Threads:

Two mysterious people live in my house. “Somebody” and “Nobody.” Somebody did it and nobody knows who.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Every day, I’m gaslit into oblivion by beautiful women, and then I go to sleep.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Adding lol to things is good feng shui.

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Activity Log ✨

If you voted for someone because “he’s not a politician”, then I hope your next colonoscopy is done by a plumber.

11 out of 10 women are always right.

Gambling is all about getting something for nothing and spending thousands of dollars trying to do it.

My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard, and I’m like, cool, can one of you reach the top shelf for me.

Who’s going to run in movies when Tom Cruise retires?

Home is where you can walk around like a bum.

The trick of life is to get the sports car before you have to grunt getting in and out of it.

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

If you voted for someone because “he’s not a politician”, then I hope your next colonoscopy is done by a plumber.

Keep the laugh going 😂

11 out of 10 women are always right.

Gambling is all about getting something for nothing and spending thousands of dollars trying to do it.

My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard, and I’m like, cool, can one of you reach the top shelf for me.

Who’s going to run in movies when Tom Cruise retires?

Home is where you can walk around like a bum.

The trick of life is to get the sports car before you have to grunt getting in and out of it.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨