Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇶🇦 has shared:

People in glass houses shouldn’t throw orgies.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has viewed:

Just saw someone my age running and she wasn’t chasing an ice-cream truck.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has viewed:

Increasing the amount of high fives I give my boss each day until he quits his job.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has downloaded:

Sunday without HBO feels like a meal without carbs — empty and deeply wrong.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has viewed:

I always carry a knife with me in case I run into someone with 10,000 spoons.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has shared:

Getting married soon. Just need a spouse.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has viewed:

My five-year plan only requires a few acts of God.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

Politics top tip: Gain people’s trust by telling them that everyone is lying to them.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has bookmarked:

Kids these days are soft. I’m pretty sure I died once when I was 7, and my mom made me walk it off.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has copied:

Would rather walk around a shop 500 times to find something than ask a member of staff who works there like a normal person.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

236 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,505

Funny Quotes Topics

17,570

Funny Quotes Images

15,505

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,600

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on X:

I love the smell of someone burning their last bridge with me.

Seen just now on Telegram:

I’m a private person except for when I’m publicly trauma dumping on social media.

Just shared via Discord:

That depressing moment when you pull up to work and the building is not engulfed in flames.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Shoutout to all ladies dating silently without making noise on social media. May God give you another man as a bonus.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Why have abs when you can have kebabs?

Broadcasted on YouTube:

You should introduce your upper lip to your bottom lip sometime and shut up.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

The echo in my house when it’s clean is unsettling. Better order more stuff.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Warning: This movie contains “Adult Themes” such as interest rates, bad knees, back pain, and excitement about going to bed early.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

I don’t have read receipts on my phone because why would I tell on myself like that?

Freshly posted on Twitch:

I never wanted to become one of those adults who just find the music of the younger generation annoying. Nobody could have guessed that the music was just annoying.

Just learned in psychology that when a man goes to sleep first, it’s because he’s comfortable around you and wants you to go through his phone.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Guess he trusts me more than his phone's passcode! 😴🔐📱"

around, comfort, comfortable, humor, just, learned, man, phone, psychology, relationship, sleep, through, trust, wants

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

If you wanna make someone cry, just show them the earliest year they can retire.

0

2 months ago

check, cry, goal, humor, just, life, life goal, reality, reality check, retirement, sad, sad truth, show, someone, truth, year
Nobody stresses a woman out more than a man who isn’t her man yet.

0

2 months ago

dating, expectations, humor, man, nobody, relationship, stress, woman
Instead of working on making myself a better person, I am going to purchase a cool new jacket.

0

2 months ago

am, better, better person, choice, cool, fashion, going, humor, i, jacket, making, materialism, myself, new, person, personal, personal choice, priorities, purchase, self-improvement, working
Incorrectly is the only word that, when spelled correctly, is still spelled incorrectly.

0

2 months ago

contradiction, humor, incorrectly, irony, language, spelled, still, word
Girls take a picture of their legs in a bubble bath and say “guess where I am”. The library?

0

2 months ago

am, bath, bubble, bubble bath, girls, guess, humor, i, irony, legs, library, media, picture, say, social, social media, take, where
Hand sanitizer will find a cut you didn’t even know you had.

0

4 days ago

cut, even, hand, hand sanitizer, health, humor, hygiene, joke, know, pain, sanitizer

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

62 shares on TikTok this month:

Science has enough bodies, I’m donating mine to English lit just to spice things up a bit.

54 shares on Reddit this month:

The biggest problem with finding another job is I don’t want one.

56 shares on Slack this month:

No matter how sad you are, there is some form of potato that can make it better.

62 shares on WeChat this month:

I love how every website has a “Keep me signed in on this computer” button and it’s just straight up bullshit.

24 shares on WhatsApp this month:

A hammock is a terrible place to receive bad news.

57 shares on Threads this month:

I feel like I’ve skipped the whole ‘go out and have fun’ stage and went straight to being an 80-year-old woman.

75 shares on X this month:

You may think no one is there for you, but there’s laundry. Laundry is always there for you.

59 shares on Threads this month:

I am cutting contact with my 3-year-old narcissist nephew.

88 shares on Instagram this month:

Aging isn’t even 1% as scary as whatever is going on with the people trying not to.

35 shares on Threads this month:

Leaving your house and returning back safely is such an underrated blessing.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇹 has viewed:

Went to an antique show and people started bidding on me.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has shared:

If you give a man a fish, he’ll eat for a day. But if you teach a man to fish, you’ll get the house to yourself on Saturdays.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has copied:

Due to personal reasons, I’m evil now.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has viewed:

Doesn’t matter if the chicken or the egg came first. Still a weird thing to just appear.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has copied:

What do you mean I never reach out? I literally thought about you.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has downloaded:

Some of you need to be visited by the ghost of ‘Quit emailing me so much before Christmas.’

Someone from 🇲🇱 has shared:

If you can’t tell which family member is coming up the stairs by the speed and weight of their footsteps, are you even family?

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

Men become instantly more attractive when they wear aviators; it’s science.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has shared:

I love coming home and being at home and sitting inside my home and staying home.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has downloaded:

You’re an atheist? Well, I don’t believe you. See how you like it.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Slack:

Yeah, I’ll get up soon, I just need to look at the internet first. Yes, the whole thing.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Tired of being the responsible adult. When can I become the irresponsible adult?

Going bananas on Instagram:

No matter how much Polynesian food you eat, you always want Samoa.

Just landed via Facebook:

Pro tip: When you sign up for anything online, put the website’s name as your middle name. Now, when you receive spam, you will know who sold your data.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

Sometimes I just say “no idea” because I’m too lazy to think.

Seen just now on Telegram:

I think during winter we should also get to work less hours in a day, just like the sun.

Shared recently on Messenger:

I do not like how Netflix threatens to start the movie while I’m just tryna read the description. Like, please, you’re making me anxious.

Seen just now on Threads:

I touched grass today, and I’m still like this. Please advise.

Just landed via TikTok:

Nobody rots in bed like I do.

Just shared via Slack:

Your secrets are safe with me. I wasn’t even listening.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Just learned in psychology that when a man goes to sleep first, it’s because he’s comfortable around you and wants you to go through his phone.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

If you wanna make someone cry, just show them the earliest year they can retire.

Nobody stresses a woman out more than a man who isn’t her man yet.

Instead of working on making myself a better person, I am going to purchase a cool new jacket.

Incorrectly is the only word that, when spelled correctly, is still spelled incorrectly.

Girls take a picture of their legs in a bubble bath and say “guess where I am”. The library?

Hand sanitizer will find a cut you didn’t even know you had.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨