58 funny wants quotes - Wordgag

If she wants the moon, you get her the moon.

May 30, 2026

Who wants to do all my adult stuff for me today?

May 30, 2026

I don’t give people directions. What if no one wants them there?

May 30, 2026

Twitter account so good even HR wants to see it.

May 30, 2026

Apple juice tastes like it wants to be alcohol, but it’s too shy.

May 30, 2026

Maybe your baby is crying because it wants a cigarette.

May 29, 2026

Websites need to realize that no one ever, ever wants the site to be able to send them notifications.

May 29, 2026

“You’re always sleeping!” God forbid a girl wants to be unconscious.

May 29, 2026

Believing that pharmaceutical companies want to heal you is like believing a casino wants you to win.

May 29, 2026

The smarter we make the A.I., the less it wants to do our jobs.

May 29, 2026

God, is there anything worse than when someone wants to show you a video?

May 29, 2026

“The heart wants what the heart wants,” I whisper as I slowly walk up to the dessert table.

May 29, 2026

If anyone wants to sponsor me, I’ll be running a 0.002K this weekend to raise awareness for laziness.

May 29, 2026

Every time I do something stupid, my dad stares at my mom like he wants a refund.

May 29, 2026

I talk to one guy, and he wants to break my heart. I talk to five guys, and they all wanna take me seriously.

May 29, 2026

The greatest research skill you can have is being a nosy bitch who wants to find out.

May 28, 2026

Maybe Baby wants to be put in the corner.

May 28, 2026

Been acting really busy today because I can tell my coworker wants to talk about something in his personal life.

May 28, 2026

Gender and sexuality aside, I believe everyone just wants someone who wears short shorts and makes a lot of noise in bed.

May 28, 2026

What kind of psychopath wants to be the life of the party?

May 28, 2026

There’s really nothing as pathetic as watching a sad little man argue with Grok in hopes of manipulating the conversation to get an answer he wants.

May 28, 2026

“You’re always sleeping,” God forbid a woman wants to be unconscious.

May 28, 2026

Everyone wants the bagel to be everything, but no one asks if the bagel needs anything.

May 28, 2026

A political guy who supports communism because he hates applying for jobs and just wants to be assigned somewhere.

May 28, 2026

Just learned in psychology that when a man goes to sleep first, it’s because he’s comfortable around you and wants you to go through his phone.

May 27, 2026

Apparently, all my new nephew wants to do is eat and sleep, which means he’s already a lot like me.

May 27, 2026

Anyone who wants to learn how to be humble, feel free to talk to me. There’s nothing like learning from the best.

May 27, 2026

Unless you fell off the treadmill, no one wants to hear about your workout.

May 27, 2026

Every guy wants to be called Daddy till that test comes back positive.

May 27, 2026

The heart wants what it wants, but it’s not the only organ that has a vote.

May 27, 2026

Everyone wants a drunk text until I’m doing it at noon.

May 26, 2026

They should invent a job that actually wants to hire you after you apply.

May 26, 2026

A narcissist wants the authority of a king while having the accountability of a toddler.

May 26, 2026

“Listen to your body!” Okay, well, my body wants to lay down and eat snacks all day.

May 26, 2026

“You’re such a stalker!” God forbid a woman wants to know more about her future husband.

May 26, 2026

Husband said he only wants to allow our kids to watch Looney Tunes and nothing else because of the “moral lessons”.

May 25, 2026

She doesn’t want flowers, she wants to invoke an ancient curse.

May 25, 2026

Spiraling out of control if anyone wants anything.

May 25, 2026

If you want to know who the bad guys are, it is the side who wants you arrested for memes and jokes.

May 24, 2026

Sleeping nakey nakey nakey just in case Santa wants a different type of cookie tonight.

May 24, 2026