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Commentary:
"Ah, the classic case of trading the frying pan for the fire 🔥😅! Wishing January away only to be met with the mighty February blues is like dodging a verbal storm only to catch a physical knockout. Stay strong, folks! 💪😂"

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

If I had just one hour left to live, I’d spend it in Math class… it never ends.

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2 months ago

class, education, endless, hour, humor, i, just, left, life, live, math, school, spend, time
I downloaded a meditation app. Now I’m stressed about missing sessions.

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2 months ago

anxiety, app, health, humor, i, irony, meditation, mental, mental health, mindfulness, missing, session, stress, technology
Drugs do not ruin your career. Drug tests do.

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2 months ago

career, drug, drug test, drugs, humor, ruin, test, testing, tests, workplace
Never make a promise you can’t keep rescheduling.

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2 months ago

commitment, expectations, humor, keep, never, planning, procrastination, promise, rescheduling
A more accurate description would be ‘The Darker Web’.

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2 months ago

accurate, dark, dark web, description, humor, internet, joke, satire, technology, web
I don’t think either person should pay for the first date. It should be on the house.

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2 months ago

advice, date, dating, dating advice, first date, house, humor, i, pay, payment, person, relationship, should, think

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

47 shares on Slack this month:

The police sent me a photo radar ticket so I sent them a photo of a hundred dollars, so I guess we’re even.

10 shares on Pinterest this month:

At this point, if you buy Tesla, everyone is just going to assume you are a loser.

59 shares on WhatsApp this month:

People are like lottery tickets, most of them are losers.

92 shares on Reddit this month:

Welcome to middle age. “I carried a watermelon” has gone from a movie quote to something you tell your orthopedist.

20 shares on Reddit this month:

You ever go to a baseball game and hear a guy yelling, “hot dogs! hot dogs!” over and over again? That’s me, looking for hot dogs.

29 shares on Reddit this month:

Born to be a frolicker of the forest, forced to be a cog in the machine.

33 shares on YouTube this month:

Telling your parents about your problems is like adding another problem to your life.

27 shares on Messenger this month:

Before you laugh at kids who believe in Santa, remember there are grown men who believe that Cristiano Ronaldo is a better footballer than Lionel Messi.

46 shares on Threads this month:

Learn from the mistakes of others, you can never live long enough to make them all yourself.

78 shares on Messenger this month:

I hate that I present as an independent woman who doesn’t need any help. It’s a facade. Help me.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

Perhaps an evening in the meditation cage will soothe you.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has bookmarked:

When they dress up really nice, but all you can think about is the thrill of taking it off.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has viewed:

I’m not even doomscrolling anymore; I’m just regular scrolling, and everything’s doomed.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has bookmarked:

How many calories does an audible sigh burn? Because I don’t think my Apple Watch is giving me credit for them.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has viewed:

Stay an extra hour in the office and no one cares. Arrive a few minutes late and everyone loses their minds.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has downloaded:

Are you really a personal trainer or do you just want to wear shorts to work every day?

Someone from 🇨🇲 has bookmarked:

You’re an atheist? Well, I don’t believe you. See how you like it.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has downloaded:

My whole life, I never read a warning label telling me not to eat laundry detergent or put glue in my hair, somehow I just knew.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has bookmarked:

Insurance is cool because even if you have it, it still kinda feels like you don’t.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has copied:

Why are poets thinking that they are the ones tortured and not those who read their poetry?

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Twitch:

Follow your dreams – ideally in a field that will still require humans when you graduate.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

When a man gets married he has a moral obligation to scare his wife when he sneezes.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

Grateful to be living in the “Tetris when it’s going too fast and blocks are helplessly piling up” era of human history.

Live now on Slack:

Sledding is the best! (until you have to walk back up the hill)

Just shared via Reddit:

Opening a Star Wars pub called Bar Bar Binks.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

Opening the web before 9am is crazy. Like, did you even try to have a good day?

Broadcasted on Messenger:

Fasted for 72 hours and gained the ability to whisper to bats.

Making waves on Telegram:

Whoever invented the “skip intro” button really understood humans.

Making waves on Discord:

Hotel towels are always the worst. So thick and fluffy that I can’t even close my suitcase.

Going viral on Telegram:

I made a smoothie that needs a spoon.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

People keep wishing January was over like the worst month of the year isn’t coming up next. Thats like wishing someone would stop arguing with you and just punch you in the face.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

If I had just one hour left to live, I’d spend it in Math class… it never ends.

I downloaded a meditation app. Now I’m stressed about missing sessions.

Drugs do not ruin your career. Drug tests do.

Never make a promise you can’t keep rescheduling.

A more accurate description would be ‘The Darker Web’.

I don’t think either person should pay for the first date. It should be on the house.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨