Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • I’m the friend who shows up with a shovel and an alibi.
  • In the autumn there are two types of creatures who collect acorns: squirrels and toddlers.
  • Using Indeed feels like being an ugly guy on a dating app.
  • Nothing rattles me like the difference between rows and columns, man. I hate it so much.
  • I always wonder who makes a more stupid face: women putting on make-up or men shaving?
  • I haven’t lost my virginity because I never lose.