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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇩 has downloaded:

Who develops the algorithm? I want to speak to the manager.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has viewed:

You can always tell it’s Monday because nobody’s smiling.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has bookmarked:

I wish I could join, but I’m busy plotting revenge because my kids laughed when I showed them I can shake it better than Shakira.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has viewed:

When things get hot, they expand, so I’m just getting warmer, not gaining weight.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has bookmarked:

Nobody victim blames more than my oldest son when he’s in trouble for punching his little brother.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has copied:

I’m already sick of tomorrow.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has viewed:

The brand name Oral B is so funny to me. WTF does the B stand for?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

330 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,923

Funny Quotes Topics

17,095

Funny Quotes Images

14,923

Updated

Dec 12, 2025

Users Online

3,982

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Saying “Who is it?” when the doctor knocks on the exam room door.

Just landed via TikTok:

My bad for thinking everyone has common sense.

Shared recently on WeChat:

They give smokers all those breaks to make up for the time taken off their lifespan.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Forget sexy talk. I want breakfast talk. Describe those waffles to me nice and slow.

Spotted on Slack:

The main reason for stress is the daily contact with idiots.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

You think you’re aging well and then you feel an earlobe hair blowing in the wind.

Just shared via Reddit:

Microsoft Teams needs to add a “spank” reaction for when I want to reprimand my employees during a video call.

Deleting dating apps to meet someone the old-fashioned way (in the HR department).

5 months ago

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Commentary:
Swiping left on dating apps, swiping right on HR policies! 😅💼❤️

app, apps, date, dating, dating app, delete, deleting, department, hr, HR department, humor, meet, old fashioned, relationship, someone, workplace

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I hate managing money, I was born to splurge.

1 month ago
born, finance, hate, humor, i, joke, managing, money, spending, splurge
You should get one IG story in addition to your one phone call when you’re arrested.

1 month ago
arrest, arrested, call, communication, humor, ig, IG story, jail, life, media, modern, modern life, phone, phone call, should, social, social media, story
How old were you when you found out people in porn aren’t actually in love?

2 months ago
actually, adult, adult content, age, content, found, humor, innocence, love, old, people, porn, realization, relationship
The Pope is the only employee who never gets to see his boss. Not even at the Christmas party.

1 month ago
boss, Christmas, employee, even, humor, never, party, Pope, religion, workplace
A woman’s G-spot can be found at the end of the word shopping.

1 month ago
activity, end, found, fun, fun activity, G-spot, humor, joke, relationship, shopping, woman, word
Normalize saying, “I’m not informed enough to have an opinion on the matter.”

1 month ago
awareness, communication, enough, honesty, humility, informed, matter, mindset, norm, normalize, opinion, saying, social, social norm, truth

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇪 has shared:

You can’t tell me there’s anything better than earplugs; I simply will not hear it.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has copied:

I actually check my emails every day in hopes I’m going to get some life-changing news someday.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has viewed:

I can’t believe we became the adults in the most unaffordable period in history.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

I’d change my name to laundry if it meant you’d think about doing me every day.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

Vatican City should be called Popenhagen.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has copied:

The web is a great place to befriend people who you’d never let in your house.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has shared:

If you respond, “A reason for living,” when a store employee asks if they can help you find something, they will leave you alone.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on TikTok:

“AI is coming for your job.” Yeah, I’d like to see AI drink 11 coffees, then have a panic attack.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Stop rushing in the morning. You’re starting your day in panic mode.

Just shared via Facebook:

Staying in bed all day is my way of saving money.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Flirting with submissives is actually really easy. All you gotta do is send a gif of a small animal and say, ‘This is so you.’

Going bananas on Slack:

Overheard the most hilarious conversation on my morning commute, then realized it was just me talking to myself in my car.

Trending via WhatsApp:

I just sneezed and farted at the same time. I think my body just took a screenshot.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Opening up to a woman is like talking to the police, anything you say can and will be used against you.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Deleting dating apps to meet someone the old-fashioned way (in the HR department).

I hate managing money, I was born to splurge.

How old were you when you found out people in porn aren’t actually in love?

The Pope is the only employee who never gets to see his boss. Not even at the Christmas party.

A woman’s G-spot can be found at the end of the word shopping.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

My ducks are not even remotely in a row. My ducks are in places no duck has ever gone before.

That “never again” talk with yourself after a certain experience is always funny.

So single the neighborhood cats make ME dinner.

I want to have a penguin that just waddles up to me whenever I’m sad.

My step counter doesn’t judge. For him, steps to the fridge are just as valuable as a walk.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trying to watch a superhero movie without stressing about the infrastructure damage to the city.

Accidentally used men’s shower gel today, and I can already feel myself lying for no reason.

I’m so lucky people can’t hear what I’m thinking.

Old age comes at a bad time. Once you finally know everything, you start to forget everything you know.

If you haven’t felt old yet today, try explaining to a teenager how little kids used to sit on a phone book at dinner to be able to reach the table.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

I hope I don’t die of something stupid like old age, I want a piano to fall on my head.

When someone dies people say “he’s going to meet his Maker”. No he’s not. God doesn’t mingle with the staff.

Welcome to your 40’s: oh you like surprises? here’s another chin. Surprise!

“It’s swimsuit season” I say, eating another swimsuit.

Humble enough to know I can be replaced, but wise enough to know ain’t nobody else like me.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

As a wife and mother my hobbies include rage cleaning, rage cooking, and rage folding.

My card declined at Subway and they started eating the sandwich in front of me.

I hate it when my pillow is not pillowing like it should. You have one job. Be a pillow man. You are pillow. Act like one!

Despite all my rage, I still keep refreshing the page.

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Activity Log ✨

Deleting dating apps to meet someone the old-fashioned way (in the HR department).

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I hate managing money, I was born to splurge.

You should get one IG story in addition to your one phone call when you’re arrested.

How old were you when you found out people in porn aren’t actually in love?

The Pope is the only employee who never gets to see his boss. Not even at the Christmas party.

A woman’s G-spot can be found at the end of the word shopping.

Normalize saying, “I’m not informed enough to have an opinion on the matter.”

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Share Wordgag 🙏