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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇿 has shared:

Can’t, trying to piece together today’s news from social media posts.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

Pregnancy is crazy. You really come home with someone you don’t know, with no teeth.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has downloaded:

Gotta find someone you’re thermostatically compatible with. You can’t be a 74 dating a 62.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

A real smart TV would increase the volume when you start eating chips.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has shared:

Me liking your post is the equivalent of an angel kissing your forehead.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has downloaded:

No one watches your story faster than someone who doesn’t talk to you.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has shared:

The art of today’s art is to persuade people that it’s art.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has downloaded:

There’s not gonna be a civil war. None of us can afford to take that much time off work.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has shared:

Do you mind if I become the object of your desire? No worries if not.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has shared:

People who talk about fruit having too much sugar scare me so bad. Please get back, you wicked witch!

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

780 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,942

Funny Quotes Topics

13,915

Funny Quotes Images

10,942

7 seconds ago

3,445

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via TikTok:

“I asked Grok. I asked ChatGPT.” Yeah, well, I asked my mom. She said no.

Live now on YouTube:

I’m trying to quit making sexual innuendos but it’s so hard.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

I think I’m closer to retirement than to a relationship.

Live now on Threads:

Women’s fall fashion is basically coming up with ways to wear a blanket without it looking like you’re wearing a blanket.

Just shared via Discord:

Roses are red. Let’s get some fresh air. Make love in the moonlight. Have a pregnancy scare.

Just landed via TikTok:

Why can’t I cry money instead of tears?

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

I’m still waiting for the day my parents will say, “It’s all fake, we are millionaires, this was just to teach you to be humble”.

Spotted on X:

My first rodeo and my last rodeo were the same rodeo.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Coconut water taste like it’s been in someone else’s mouth.

Trending via Twitch:

Call me dramatic, but I think I deserve a love confession in the rain.

Home » Funny Early Quotes

64 Funny early quotes

Funny early quotes 😄 are like hidden gems from the past, offering a cheeky glimpse into the humor of bygone days! Whether it’s a witty remark from a historical figure or a playful saying that stood the test of time, these snippets tickle our funny bones 😂. They remind us that humor transcends generations, bridging the gap between then and now with a giggle or two. Let’s dive into the chuckles of yesteryear! 🎉📜

New funny early quotes 👇

11 seconds ago
Share →: Every squad has that person who has to go home early.

Commentary:
When the group chat says "party till dawn," but your inner grandma insists on bedtime by 9 PM 😴🛌✨
3 days ago
Share →: Hope this email finds you moonwalking out of work early.

Commentary:
Just trying not to trip over my own feet 😆🌕💃
3 days ago
Share →: I can’t wait to retire so I can get up at 6 a.m. and go drive around really slow and make everybody late for work.

Commentary:
Driving slow in the fast lane: the real retirement perk 😂🚗💨🕖
5 days ago
Share →: Just because I’m up sharing posts at 7 a.m. doesn’t mean I’m up. Don’t call my phone.

Commentary:
Still buffering in the morning like a Wi-Fi connection in the basement 😂📱🌛
6 days ago
Share →: When you look this sexy, they should let you leave work early.

Commentary:
Trying to leave work early because I look too good and my coworkers can't handle the distraction 😎💼🚪
6 days ago
Share →: The first time people saw a train coming at them, they ran away in terror.

Commentary:
I guess they didn't have "train-ing" for that back then! 🚂😱😂
1 week ago
Share →: The first person to ever throw up was probably like, “Ok, what the hell.”

Commentary:
When your stomach invents interpretative dance without your permission 😂🤢💃
1 week ago
Share →: The children seemed disappointed when I told them the best part about being an adult is going to bed early.

Commentary:
When the bedtime becomes the highlight of your day, you know youre winning at adulthood! 😴😆 #LivingTheDream
1 week ago
Share →: Starting your day with an early morning run is a great way to make sure your day can’t get any worse than it started.

Commentary:
"Nothing like a morning jog to remind me why I prefer pancakes! 🏃‍♂️🥞😅"
2 weeks ago
Share →: You should be allowed to leave work early if you miss your wife enough.

Commentary:
"Forget work benefits, I'm voting for 'Miss Your Spouse Leave Days'! 😂💼❤️ #RelationshipGoals #BestEmployeePolicy"

For even more funny early quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny early quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

780 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,942

Funny Quotes Topics

13,915

Funny Quotes Images

10,942

7 seconds ago

3,444

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇪 has shared:

Twitter is great because you can tweet “hi” and someone will tell you you’re wrong.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has copied:

When I take a walk, I bring dog treats and people treats. I almost never mix them up.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has shared:

I’ve just filed a restraining order against reality.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has viewed:

It’s a good thing Titanic is only a movie. A lot of people would’ve died.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has shared:

I’m not a perfectionist. I’m more of a good-enoughist.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has bookmarked:

Dear predictive text, I am tired of sending people “Thanksgiving” when they send me a recipe or directions.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

Everyone’s an expert after the fact.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

Having a daughter is like having a little broke best friend who thinks you’re rich.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has viewed:

I love when my grandma texts me — because I know it took her an hour.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has viewed:

Bro, did you really just mix up e.g. and i.e. in front of the hoes?

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via TikTok:

There’s something fundamentally wrong with the way people interact with each other on LinkedIn.

Just shared via Discord:

I’m the kind of crazy you weren’t warned about because no one knew this level existed.

Going viral on Reddit:

Changed my bio on bumble to “I’m gonna murder ur whole family” and guys still responded.

Trending via Pinterest:

Welcome to your 40s: your chin looks lonely, here’s another one.

Live now on Pinterest:

If you think about it, Santa really has the best job, he works one day a year and spends the rest of his time judging people.

Seen just now on Discord:

Marriage is 33.3% hiding to eat snacks because you and your spouse are supposed to be on a diet.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Is it just me or does everything cost like we’re shopping in an airport now?

Seen just now on Instagram:

My kids couldn’t care less about personal hygiene unless we are running late somewhere.

Going viral on Twitch:

When you really want to slap someone, do it and say, “Mosquito!

Just landed via X:

Guy who normally applauds when the plane lands right before the pilot crashes it: “Boo!”

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