167 Funny getting quotes

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  5 months ago

  Share →: If someone leaves your life, it’s often because the actor playing them is getting cancelled in the real world.

  Commentary:
  "Looks like the actor behind that character is about to receive a 'plot twist' in real life! 🌟🎥 Time to update the cast list and find a replacement! 🎬😂"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Friends with benefits but the benefits are you getting me an internship with your father’s network.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs casual hookups when you can secure a job instead? 😂👔 Let's just hope this 'Friendship with Benefits' doesn't come with awkward performance reviews! 🤞💼 #NetworkingStrategy"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Everyone is getting idioter.

  Commentary:
  Looks like the intelligence pool is turning into a shallow puddle! 🤪🤦‍♂️ Don't worry, we can always rely on the smart cookies to keep things afloat…hopefully! 🍪🧠 #IdiotsEverywhere

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  5 months ago

  Share →: What’s the point of having sex dreams if you always wake up just when it’s getting down to business?

  Commentary:
  "Ah, yes, the ultimate tease from our subconscious – giving us the tantalizing buildup in a sex dream, only to rudely awaken us right before the main event! 😏 It’s like a non-consensual cliffhanger from the dream world – talk about a plot twist! 😂 Sweet dreams or blue-balled nightmares? You decide! 🌙✨"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Unfair that the older I get, the clearer photo quality gets.

  Commentary:
  It's like the universe is saying, "Hey, here's better photo quality to capture every single wrinkle and gray hair of wisdom you've earned!" 📸👵🏼😂 #AgingLikeAFinePixel

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Getting tired without doing anything is an art form.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the elusive skill of exhausting oneself through pure inertia 🎨💤 Who knew that mastering the art of relaxation could be so demanding? Take a bow, my fellow nap enthusiasts, for we are the true virtuosos of a well-deserved break! 🛌😆"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Getting excited to go to bed is a different level of adulting.

  Commentary:
  "Who would have thought that eagerly anticipating bedtime would be a highlight of adulthood? 🛏️💤 It's like being a kid again, just with more responsibilities and less energy! 😂 #AdultingProblems"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Nothing hurts more than someone not getting your joke.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the pain of a joke falling flat! It's like experiencing a comedy show with crickets as the only audience 🦗, or telling a hilarious pun and receiving a blank stare in return. Remember, humor is subjective – but nothing stings quite like a joke lost in translation! #MisunderstoodLaughs"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Just checked my bank account. Looks like everyone’s getting a hug for Christmas.

  Commentary:
  "Looks like Santa's workshop had a budget cut this year! 🎅💸 Time to spread some goodwill… through virtual hugs! 🤗💸 #BrokeSanta #HugsForChristmas"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Spotify wrapped is like my annual mental health report and it’s getting worse by each passing year.

  Commentary:
  "Looks like my Spotify wrapped is turning into a horror film sequel 🎬👻🎵 Who knew my mental health could be measured in play counts and skip ratios? 📈😅 #ScaryStats"

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