Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇲 has viewed:

Sorry boys, but I’ve already got my eyes on a guy who’s not interested.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

“Too much garlic”? What’s next? Too much love? Too much desire?

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

If you’re cremated after you die, you can be put into an hourglass and continue to participate in family game night.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has shared:

I hate when people are like “you are so nice”. I’m ugly, I have no other choice.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has shared:

It’s fun getting room service. I just love eating a $19 hamburger at a desk in front of a mirror.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has copied:

Practicing how I’m gonna explain to the aliens that baseline and Vaseline do not sound the same.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has shared:

There’s a disconnect between the decibel level of my car singing and my talent.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has downloaded:

I’d pretend to care about football for you.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has shared:

Hey kid, wanna hear a scary story? One day, you will be able to do whatever you want, and you will choose to stay home alone.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has shared:

Every time a Taco Bell rings, an angel gets diarrhea.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

244 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,513

Funny Quotes Topics

17,581

Funny Quotes Images

15,513

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,666

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Telegram:

Ever been in the car with someone who drives so fast that you press your imaginary brakes on the passenger side?

Just landed via Reddit:

Really looking forward to the day my teenager starts speaking English again.

Breaking via TikTok:

Deleted old Tweets just in case I date a very famous woman with rabid fans.

Seen just now on Discord:

Marry someone the same size as you to avoid decades of annoyance adjusting the seats and mirrors in the car.

Making waves on X:

Just found out it don’t matter how early I go to bed, I just don’t wanna go to work.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

My boss doesn’t want dogs in the office. But he didn’t say anything about alpacas.

Broadcasted on X:

You’re still ragebaiting? Everyone is on vagueposting now. Keep up.

Making waves on Messenger:

“Hey you!” is short for “I have no idea what your name is.”

Going viral on Reddit:

My doctor no longer prescribes me Viagra. He just left me hanging.

Just landed via Messenger:

He’s called James Cameron because he turns the camera on.

I am writing a book about reverse psychology. Please don’t buy it.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Finally, a book I definitely *won't* put on my shelf. 😂📚 #ReversePsychologyWin"

am, book, buy, humor, i, irony, persuasion, please, psychological, psychological trick, psychology, reverse, reverse psychology, sarcasm, trick, writing

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Just realized John the Baptist and Winnie the Pooh have the same middle name.

0

3 weeks ago

baptist, biblical, biblical figure, cartoon, cartoon character, character, figure, humor, John, John the Baptist, just, middle, middle name, name, pooh, same, winnie, Winnie the Pooh, wordplay
My search history is filled with me googling regular words just to make sure I’m using them right.

0

2 months ago

confusion, filled, Googling, history, humor, just, language, me, regular, regular word, right, search, search history, sure, using, using right, word, words
Stop using ChatGPT. I can feed you misinformation too and I’m also beautiful and funny sometimes.

0

2 months ago

AI, beautiful, ChatGPT, feed, humor, i, misinformation, self-deprecation, sometimes, stop, technology, too, wit
My most boomer complaint is that nobody knows how to bring an item out of courtesy to parties anymore.

0

2 months ago

behavior, boomer, bring, complaint, courtesy, etiquette, item, knows, most, nobody, party, social, social behavior
Planking is the only time we appreciate time.

0

2 months ago

activity, appreciate, fun, fun activity, humor, only, planking, social, social trend, time, trend
You are what you eat! (If anyone needed more encouragement to eat the rich.)

0

2 months ago

commentary, eat, encouragement, food, humor, rich, satire, social, social commentary

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

96 shares on TikTok this month:

As a teen: secretly drinking in the park with friends. As an adult: secretly drinking in the park with squirrels.

66 shares on Messenger this month:

Saw a big spider crawl into my closet last night. He’s probably in there trying on all my clothes, acting like he’s me.

38 shares on Snapchat this month:

Ground beef implies the existence of sky beef.

75 shares on Facebook this month:

Netflix be like “we know exactly what movie you talkin’ ’bout but we ain’t got it lol”.

89 shares on Snapchat this month:

Anyone else get excited about going to bed because you know there’ll be coffee in the morning, or is that just me?

32 shares on Telegram this month:

People shouldn’t be at the grocery store the same time as me. Get out of the way.

27 shares on YouTube this month:

One day I’ll have a sassy, know-it-all daughter, and my husband will say, “She got that from you,” and I can’t wait.

35 shares on Instagram this month:

“You’re a cardiologist? Is that like a fancy name for an auto mechanic?”

33 shares on Slack this month:

The winter months remind me that it is crucial to find someone that you’re thermostatically compatible with.

54 shares on WhatsApp this month:

When I was a child, my social network was called ‘outside’.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇪 has copied:

Being in your 20s is crazy because, why did you stay with someone you were that incompatible with for that long?

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

Don’t drink to forget me, you’ll end up seeing me double.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has copied:

New challenge called “don’t say ‘wow it’s already dark by five these days’ for the rest of winter”

Someone from 🇨🇳 has shared:

I’m upset that my parents never got rich enough for me to become a socialist.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has bookmarked:

Nobody knows my next move. Not even me.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has shared:

I bet whenever a pilot drives a car there’s a brief moment of panic like “why isn’t it going up?”

Someone from 🇦🇸 has downloaded:

I grew up in a poor family. We didn’t have much, but we had each other. And that was the worst part.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has shared:

People who work in retail should be allowed to slap a customer or two each Christmas, as a little treat.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has bookmarked:

After I get irritated, it takes me about 2 hours to fix my face.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has bookmarked:

Please don’t send me mixed signals, I don’t even understand the clear ones.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Facebook:

At this point, I’m not sure if my house is a mess or my mess is a house.

Trending via TikTok:

Sex is cool, but have you ever received reassurance without asking for it?

Shared recently on Reddit:

For a long time, I didn’t know what to do with my strange thoughts. Then I signed up for Facebook.

Making waves on Twitch:

Never meeting another person again, so if I know you already, congrats!

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Old enough to know better. Young enough to do it anyway.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

I ghost family members too, so believe me, bro — it’s not personal.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

When I was young I fixed my parents’ computer and now that I’m older I fix computers for my kids. Are we the only generation that knows how computers work?

Seen just now on Twitch:

Dear God, thank you for the job I have. But if you have a lottery win planned for me, I’m ready! Thank you.

Freshly posted on Slack:

A narcissist wants the authority of a king while having the accountability of a toddler.

Just shared via Reddit:

Weekends are a scam. You spend one day exhausted and the other anxious… like, what was that?

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I am writing a book about reverse psychology. Please don’t buy it.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Just realized John the Baptist and Winnie the Pooh have the same middle name.

My search history is filled with me googling regular words just to make sure I’m using them right.

Stop using ChatGPT. I can feed you misinformation too and I’m also beautiful and funny sometimes.

My most boomer complaint is that nobody knows how to bring an item out of courtesy to parties anymore.

Planking is the only time we appreciate time.

You are what you eat! (If anyone needed more encouragement to eat the rich.)

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨