“A healthy lifestyle is all about balance,” I say as I drive through Taco Bell after working out.

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I’m like the Temu version of a well-functioning adult.

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The secret to work life balance is generational wealth.

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We get it, comma, you went to Oxford.

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I’m at the age where I won’t make eye contact with someone because they look like a “talker.”

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The tragedy of my life is that I theoretically know when I shouldn’t say anything. And then I hear myself talking.

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I’m sick of diarrhea. I want to livarrhea.

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When a man is a good cook, that cancels out like three red flags.