Commentary:
My muscles are like, "Exercise? I don't know her!" 🏋️♂️🤷♂️😂
76 Funny working quotes
If you’re thinking of becoming a parent, just imagine working 6,570 days straight without a day off.
Commentary:
Looks like my future job title is "Sleep-Deprived Snack Provider" 🍕😴👶
Bob Ross could paint a forest in 10 minutes. I’ve been ‘working on myself’ for years, and I’m still unfinished.
Commentary:
Sounds like Bob Ross had his happy little trees figured out faster than I can find my own zen forest! 🌳🖌️🤔
“A healthy lifestyle is all about balance,” I say as I drive through Taco Bell after working out.
Commentary:
Balancing my macros: 50% exercise, 50% tacos 🌮🏋️♀️😋
Nightmares are so embarrassing. Why is my anxiety working the night shift?
Commentary:
When your anxiety insists on the night shift, but you're just trying to dream of happy llamas 🦙😴🌜
Dating apps aren’t working, time to start drinking beer and eating hot dogs along the first base line at a baseball game.
Commentary:
Looks like it's time to trade left swipes for hot dogs and baseball strikes! 🍺🌭⚾️
Working as a 911 operator but hanging up when someone starts screaming because I’m an empath, and it overwhelms me.
Commentary:
"Imagine empath levels so high, even my phone has an auto-hang-up button! 📞🤣🧘"
There hasn’t been a single person in human history that was remembered for spending their life working a 9-5 job.
Commentary:
Time to trade my 9-5 for a future where I'm known as the legendary couch potato 🛋️✨ #Priorities
Working your entire life so you can ‘enjoy’ a couple of years when you’re close to death is the biggest scam of all time.
Commentary:
Trading youth for a senior discount doesn't seem like a fair deal! 🤔👴💸
This entire year I was method acting. None of it was real. I was working on a bit.
Commentary:
Next year's performance has already been nominated for the Drama Desk Awards! 🎭😂