51 funny workout quotes - Wordgag

“A healthy lifestyle is all about balance,” I say as I drive through Taco Bell after working out.

May 30, 2026

Just did several sets of some bullshit at the gym… no idea which muscles have been targeted.

May 30, 2026

I should go to jail so I can focus on the gym.

May 30, 2026

Went to the gym two days in a row. This is a fitness account now.

May 30, 2026

Wild Friday night, and by wild, I mean me and the other psychopaths at the gym.

May 29, 2026

If by ‘leg day’ you mean a day that we put your legs on my shoulders, then yes, I love leg day.

May 29, 2026

I run every day for 30 minutes. If I miss a day, I add 30 minutes to the next day. This has truly been a game changer. Tomorrow I’m supposed to run for 3 weeks.

May 29, 2026

They say half the battle of getting in shape is mental, so I thought about the gym really hard today.

May 29, 2026

Need to win the lottery so I can focus on going to museums and working out.

May 28, 2026

Scrolling should count as cardio.

May 28, 2026

Have been dipping my toe into doing Pilates, and let me tell you, women are real sickos.

May 28, 2026

Just worked out for 2 hours straight and 1 hour gay.

May 28, 2026

When physical labor became optional, we invented the gym. We’ll need the same thing for the mind.

May 28, 2026

Peeling a sweaty sports bra off counts as aerobic exercise, right?

May 28, 2026

Just got some minutes of cardio trying to pick up an ice cube from the kitchen floor.

May 28, 2026

You never realize how long a minute is until you’re exercising.

May 27, 2026

Running to the boarding gate is my favorite workout.

May 27, 2026

I have no idea how people meet at the gym. I turn into a disgusting, angry swamp witch every time I exercise.

May 27, 2026

Working out consistently yields results, but mannnnnnn…… the laundry.

May 27, 2026

I know it hurts like hell, and you don’t think you can do it, but it’s just one push-up.

May 27, 2026

Unless you fell off the treadmill, no one wants to hear about your workout.

May 27, 2026

I don’t do exercise because one time I kneed myself in the face doing a burpee.

May 27, 2026

If I complain about being out of shape, I don’t actually want fitness tips and workouts to try. I just want to complain and remain out of shape. What is wrong with you people?

May 27, 2026

The only way I’m gonna hit the gym is if I accidentally drive into it.

May 27, 2026

At the gym and I forgot my headphones and now I have to listen to my own thoughts. Send help.

May 26, 2026

I’ve found that the easiest way to do burpees is to just not do burpees. No pain, no pain.

May 26, 2026

If only guys would moan in bed like they do in the gym…

May 26, 2026

Watermelon. The fruit that comes with a workout.

May 26, 2026

Might go to prison so I can focus on the gym properly.

May 25, 2026

Attempted to exercise this morning. Didn’t work out.

May 25, 2026

I was actually about to do a workout when the couch threw itself protectively under me.

May 23, 2026

Can’t. Just put my hair in a bun and that’s just about enough exercise for today.

May 23, 2026

The thing I hate most about my stationary bike is having to pick it up and turn it around for the return trip.

May 22, 2026

If you sweat while you eat, it should count as a workout.

May 22, 2026

Hell hath no fury like a sports bra being applied to a just showered but not 100% dry body.

May 22, 2026

If you’re a squatter, every day is leg day.

May 22, 2026

Your brain needs exercise just as much as your body does. That’s why I think of running everyday.

May 22, 2026

I’ve added lunges to my workout routine. It’s a big step forward.

May 22, 2026

The part right before bench pressing when you’re laying down but not lifting is so good.

May 21, 2026

My workout goals are simple: I’d just like to be able to get up off the floor without looking like a turtle trying to flip itself back over.

May 21, 2026