Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇭 has copied:

Hey, if the Earth could stop air frying me, that’d be great.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has downloaded:

Sorry, I don’t think I can hang out this weekend, my 4-year-old is still telling a joke.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has shared:

Asking women for sex just to end the conversation.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has copied:

Not to brag but I always pick the slowest moving checkout line at the grocery store.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has bookmarked:

He probably follows so many women because he believes in elevating their voices.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

Unfortunately, when you don’t burden people with your problems, they assume you don’t have any. Lol.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has bookmarked:

Can someone please just give me a participation trophy for making it through today, please?

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

When someone giving me directions says, “You can’t miss it,” I would love to tell them just how wrong they were if I could find my way back to them.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

If I met someone like me, I’d be really concerned for them.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has bookmarked:

The toughest part of being a vegan is keeping it to yourself.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,668

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on X:

“Do not touch” must be one of the scariest things to read in braille.

Going viral on Messenger:

If we start flirting now, we could be in matching pajamas on a Christmas card before the holidays.

Going viral on WeChat:

If Wonka had a spaghetti factory, I’d get sucked into a marinara river tube so fast.

Making waves on TikTok:

I need to start hiding my money from myself.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Job applications be like “how did you hear about us?”. Bro why, was it a secret?

Making waves on Pinterest:

That was a nice hour long Twitter scroll. Feel much worse as always. See you guys tomorrow.

Spotted on Telegram:

Even when I look up the slang of today’s kids, I still have no idea what it means.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

I’m old enough to remember when rainbows were in black and white.

Shared recently on Discord:

The feminine urge to start a coven.

Live now on Discord:

Job market so bad, I started following my dreams.

Fitbits are just Tamagotchis, except the stupid animal you’re trying to keep alive is you.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Just waiting for my Fitbit to start demanding I feed it, or worse, clean up after it! 😂🐾 #HumanGochi"

activity, alive, animal, except, FitBit, fitness, fun, fun activity, humor, just, keep, motivation, self-care, stupid, Tamagotchi, technology, trying

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

The best part of the relationship is before you meet them, and you’re single.

0

2 months ago

activity, before, best, dating, freedom, fun, fun activity, independence, life, meet, pre-meet, relationship, single, single life
Asking my landlord if he has any Cyber Monday deals.

0

4 weeks ago

asking, cyber, Cyber Monday, deal, deals, humor, landlord, Monday, negotiation, rent, shopping
The more you embrace your crazy side, the more fun life becomes.

0

2 months ago

adventure, crazy, crazy side, embrace, fun, humor, joy, life, personality, side
Confession: If you’ve ever been in a revolving door with me, I was only pretending to push.

0

2 months ago

awkward, awkward situation, confession, door, ever, funny moment, honesty, humor, i, me, moment, pretending, push, revolving, revolving door, situation
Shit posting is cheaper than therapy.

0

5 months ago

cheaper, coping, coping mechanism, culture, health, humor, internet, internet culture, mechanism, media, mental, mental health, posting, shit, shitposting, social, social media, therapy
Hey (with the intention of making your fries my fries).

0

2 months ago

food, fry, humor, intention, joke, making, sharing

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

22 shares on Threads this month:

Oxygen was discovered in 1773. How did our ancestors breathe before then?

26 shares on Snapchat this month:

People will love you. People will hate you. And none of it will have anything to do with you.

23 shares on TikTok this month:

I’m not saying it’s been a while, I’m just saying I completely blanked on the name of my gym.

74 shares on X this month:

The worst thing you can do when you notice your kids are playing nicely together is telling them that they’re playing nicely together.

77 shares on Snapchat this month:

Imagine hating me, and I’m just over here making love.

25 shares on Pinterest this month:

I’m not religious but I know there’s a hell because Monopoly exists.

43 shares on Facebook this month:

If you wanna make someone cry, just show them the earliest year they can retire.

50 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Ever read a post multiple times, still tilt your head and whisper, “What?!”

59 shares on WeChat this month:

The Gulf of Mexico should’ve been renamed to Sea Señor.

76 shares on Pinterest this month:

Being in love will have you put your pride aside and go to places you never thought you would, like New Jersey.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇧 has viewed:

Italy stands for I Truly Always Love You.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has copied:

Most of being a woman is just removing exclamation points from emails before you send them.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has copied:

I never wanted to become one of those adults who just find the music of the younger generation annoying. Nobody could have guessed that the music was just annoying.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

I don’t want to stand, Apple Watch. You stand.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has copied:

I’m not built to work, I’m built to brood in a castle with all my unread books.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has viewed:

I had big plans to sleep in today, but my bladder canceled.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has shared:

Italians, look away now. I break my spaghetti in half before I cook it.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has shared:

Andrew Tate is what you’d get if Axe body spray gained consciousness.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has bookmarked:

There is too much happening for mid-December. Where are the canceled meetings? Why are we not circling back next year?

Someone from 🇳🇦 has downloaded:

Used to wonder why my parents couldn’t grasp technology, but now, anytime I see something new, I’m like, “I’m not learning that.”

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via WeChat:

Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what the hell happened.

Trending via Facebook:

Every day, a new coworker asks if you’ve used ChatGPT, and the conversation doesn’t end if you say “No.”

Shared recently on Discord:

Apparently, when you treat someone the same way they treat you, they get offended!

Trending via WhatsApp:

I’m at the age when riding around town, I say, “When did they build that?”

Going viral on WhatsApp:

The voodoo magic of a tranquil night’s sleep

Making waves on Slack:

Our parents are going to be shocked when they find out that most of us are serious about not getting married.

Seen just now on YouTube:

In six days God created heaven and earth. On the seventh day, in the interests of balance, the BBC interviewed Satan.

Just landed via Pinterest:

My plans for today? Same as always, drink coffee and be sexy.

Making waves on Reddit:

Every Jurassic Park movie should end with an insurance adjuster getting a phone call and immediately throwing up.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

If your problem can’t be fixed by coffee, tequila or sex then I’m out of advice.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Fitbits are just Tamagotchis, except the stupid animal you’re trying to keep alive is you.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

The best part of the relationship is before you meet them, and you’re single.

Asking my landlord if he has any Cyber Monday deals.

The more you embrace your crazy side, the more fun life becomes.

Confession: If you’ve ever been in a revolving door with me, I was only pretending to push.

Shit posting is cheaper than therapy.

Hey (with the intention of making your fries my fries).

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨