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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฉ๐Ÿ‡ฒ has copied:

Phone addiction got so bad that watching a movie feels productive.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฏ๐Ÿ‡ฒ has viewed:

Old people get so mad when youโ€™re young and tired.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ป has downloaded:

Iโ€™m not a perfectionist. Iโ€™m more of a good-enoughist.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฐ๐Ÿ‡ท has bookmarked:

A garlic a day keeps people away.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฉ๐Ÿ‡ช has shared:

Dogs are like chicken nuggets; every time I see one, I want it.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ป has copied:

Just imagine how great life would be if pizza made you skinny.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ช has viewed:

Betrayal only comes from someone weโ€™re close to. Just like herpes.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ช๐Ÿ‡ฌ has viewed:

Single, not sure how to mingle.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ฎ has shared:

I have noticed something quite worrying: after I buy more things I have less money.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ต๐Ÿ‡ฑ has viewed:

I am not “quiet quitting”, I am suffering from third-degree burnout.

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

846 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,008

Funny Quotes Topics

13,946

Funny Quotes Images

11,008

Updated

10 minutes ago

Users Online

3,433

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Some of you are still single because, when someone sends you romantic words, you reply with “hahaha.”

Shared recently on Snapchat:

If I ever look at my phone in the middle of a conversation with you, Iโ€™m not reading a text; Iโ€™m just looking up the definition of a word I just used a bit too confidently.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

I accidentally messed up my life. How do I start a new account?

Reported on LinkedIn:

There should be a day between Sunday and Monday called Hang on a Second.

Just landed via TikTok:

Back to work after the long holiday weekend, so youโ€™re finally away from the relatives you donโ€™t like, and back with the co-workers you donโ€™t like.

Just shared via Threads:

Itโ€™s crazy windy today. Trash is blowing everywhere, so watch out for your ex.

Trending via Pinterest:

Having a peanut allergy has to be so wild. Like, imagine youโ€™re at a baseball game and there are people chucking bags of rattlesnakes past your head.

Spotted on YouTube:

If I let you into my life, I am either emotionally invested or you are a grilled cheese sandwich.

Spotted on Threads:

Sick and tired of these 30 mins weekends.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

The difference between the Olympic village and a normal village is that not everyone in the Olympic village is related to each other.

I think the bowl of ice cream I ate earlier gave me a stomach ache, so I ate a another bowl to make sure.

I think the bowl of ice cream I ate earlier gave me a stomach ache, so I ate a another bowl to make sure.
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Commentary:
"Ah, the classic 'fight fire with fire' strategy, but with ice cream ๐Ÿฆ! Because clearly, the solution to an upset stomach is simply more ice cream, right? ๐Ÿ˜… Who needs logic when you can have two bowls of deliciousness instead!"

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Welcome to Wordgag! ๐Ÿ˜‰โœŒ๏ธ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ’ฅ

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm sleep social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

846 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,008

Funny Quotes Topics

13,946

Funny Quotes Images

11,008

Updated

10 minutes ago

Users Online

3,428

Funny Quotes of the Month ๐Ÿš€

Funny Quotes of the Year โญ

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ฆ has shared:

I’ve asked so many people what LGBTQ stands for. So far no one has given me a straight answer.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ป๐Ÿ‡จ has bookmarked:

Sometimes I read a text and think, “What a psycho.” And then I press send.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ท๐Ÿ‡ด has viewed:

Due to personal reasons, Iโ€™ll be using humor to hide pain.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฏ๐Ÿ‡ต has downloaded:

I like to people-watch, but Iโ€™m an advanced people-watcher. When I spot another people-watcher, I like to watch them watching other people.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ท has viewed:

Wow, another wooden ball. Would it kill avocado makers to put a different toy in there?

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฏ๐Ÿ‡ฒ has shared:

Whenever Iโ€™m not eating a breakfast sandwich I wish I was eating a breakfast sandwich.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ฆ has copied:

Ironically jogging pants are mostly worn by the laziest people.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡น has shared:

Ladies, repeat after me: “I was wrong and I am sorry!”

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ช๐Ÿ‡ช has viewed:

The fact that I have a lot of wine in the house proves that I don’t drink much. Otherwise the wine would be gone.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ท has shared:

I was having a great time until I remembered that I was ugly.

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Just landed via Reddit:

On Halloween, Iโ€™ll be handing out full size bars of really bad advice. Only while supplies last.

Reported on Instagram:

Autumn is when men run around like it’s summer and women like it’s winter.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Writing ‘thanks.’ instead of ‘thanks!’ so you know I’m mad.

Just landed via Twitch:

When I was a kid I would say Iโ€™m whatever age and a half because I wanted to be older. Now I say I turned 40 a few years ago.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

I Knew Better, But I Did It Anyway: A Memoir

Just shared via Discord:

Itโ€™s cute when kids say what they want to be when they grow up. Youโ€™re gonna write emails on the computer, buddy.

Just landed via Facebook:

Ladies, repeat after me: “I was wrong and I am sorry!”

Seen just now on Twitch:

I never thought I would say this, and it took me a while to come to terms, but I think I ate too much bacon.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Is this art or trash?

Trending via Reddit:

My favorite military tradition is asking someone what an acronym means right after they use it, and they donโ€™t know what it means.

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