Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇪 has viewed:

How long does it take for an apple to turn brown after you cut it? Never mind.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has copied:

This meeting could have been an unread email.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has shared:

You’re never too old to become less of an idiot.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has viewed:

It sucks when you realize it’s only Thursday, until you realize it’s only Wednesday.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has bookmarked:

“You’re so understanding,” yeah, because I don’t want to go to prison for the rest of my life.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has copied:

The final act of love is not texting them happy birthday.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has shared:

Hi, I’m online. Would you like to argue for an hour about whether a hotdog is a sandwich?

Someone from 🇧🇴 has copied:

I wonder if my date ever found her way out of that corn maze.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has copied:

I speak my mind, cause it hurts when I bite my tongue.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has copied:

It is a shame that nothing is built in America anymore. I just bought a TV that said: “Built in Antenna”. I don’t even know where that is.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

75 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,344

Funny Quotes Topics

17,462

Funny Quotes Images

15,344

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,388

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Messenger:

Dog barking like an angry baby, baby crying like an angry dog.

Trending via Pinterest:

I love traveling because I love to check if I have my passport every 3-4 minutes.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

The thing about sleep is that I’d like to get some of it.

Just landed via Messenger:

Anyone else get excited about going to bed because you know there’ll be coffee in the morning, or is that just me?

Just shared via LinkedIn:

I’m not shy. I just don’t like you.

Spotted on Telegram:

I totally get why Leonardo DiCaprio is trying to save the environment for future generations. They could be his girlfriend.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Menstruation is bizarre. It’s like something David Lynch would have came up with.

Going viral on Slack:

The most dangerous part of your 50s is those first few steps after prolonged sitting.

Making waves on Instagram:

I shall have another coffee, for I am sleeping standing.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

Due to personal reasons, I must make it in life.

I’ll make direct eye contact while eating a hot dog, just to make you feel weird.

5 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Locking eyes over a hot dog showdown 🍴👀🌭 Let the awkwardness begin!

awkward, contact, direct, dog, eating, eye, eye contact, feel, hot, hot dog, humor, interaction, just, social, social interaction, weird, while

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I’m not super into getting older but I do like how nobody asks me to help them move anymore.

0

2 months ago

adulthood, aging, funny observation, getting, getting older, help, humor, i, me, move, nobody, observation, older, responsibility, super
It really is Monday every 15 minutes.

0

2 months ago

every, humor, minutes, Monday, procrastination, routine, stress, time, week, work
When I was a kid, I never expected the future to suck this much.

0

2 months ago

disappointment, expectation, future, growing, growing up, humor, i, kid, much, never, reality, sarcasm, suck
I love when really expensive products say, “apply generously,” like, of course, you would say that.

0

2 months ago

advertising, application, beauty, consumer, consumer humor, course, expensive, humor, i, love, luxury, luxury products, products, sarcasm, say, skincare
“What fresh hell is this?“ It’s actually the same hell as yesterday. Not fresh at all, really.

0

2 months ago

actually, comedy, daily, daily grind, fresh, frustration, grind, hell, humor, irony, repetition, same, sarcasm, yesterday
Showing your emotions to the wrong people is like bleeding next to a shark.

0

3 weeks ago

bleeding, danger, emotion, emotions, feelings, metaphor, next, people, shark, showing, trust, vulnerability, wrong

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

66 shares on Facebook this month:

The gothic urge to live in a sleepy seaside town with a terrifying backstory.

93 shares on Discord this month:

Never underestimate my ability to effortlessly make something more difficult than it needs to be.

84 shares on Discord this month:

Corporate life requires an ass-licking skill set I simply wasn’t born with.

12 shares on Reddit this month:

That awkward moment when everything is going so perfectly… and then you wake up.

16 shares on TikTok this month:

I’m cosplaying as a functional adult again.

58 shares on YouTube this month:

Gimme coffee or I’ll sleep amok!

11 shares on Messenger this month:

Maybe God will gift me a boyfriend for my birthday this year.

73 shares on YouTube this month:

Dear brain, please finally learn the difference between hunger and boredom. I’m getting fat.

14 shares on Telegram this month:

Ever looked at your ex and wondered, was I drunk the entire relationship?

79 shares on Discord this month:

Getting a key tattoo, but getting it covered up with a doormat tattoo, so no one ever finds it.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇲 has viewed:

No more bare minimum, I want the moon and the stars. Maybe even a planet at this point.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

I haven’t tried Yoga, but I bent over to pick up my keys off the floor, so I’m sure I wouldn’t like Yoga.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has shared:

There should be a true crime story about feeding someone a peanut butter sandwich and giving them nothing to drink.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has downloaded:

I never learned to swim because I didn’t think it would ever be more than an hour since I last ate.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has shared:

Did you know there are people who go away for 3 days and only pack 3 days’ worth of clothing?

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

If you are influenced by influencers, you’re beyond retarded.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

Unfortunately for the both of us, I really like you.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has bookmarked:

Do people who love escape rooms not know about IKEA?

Someone from 🇹🇯 has viewed:

Dudes be named Will but won’t.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has viewed:

The best way to get through Monday is to pretend it’s Tuesday.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Twitch:

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did, in his sleep, not screaming, like the passengers in his car.

Trending via Discord:

For a long time, I didn’t know what to do with my strange thoughts. Then I signed up for Facebook.

Making waves on Telegram:

I was told to be more optimistic so I’ve decided french fries aren’t bad for me.

Making waves on Instagram:

I try not to post too much, to give everyone else a better chance at being seen.

Just landed via WeChat:

Putting together a piece of furniture today, so my kids are about to learn swear words that haven’t even been invented yet.

Just landed via Messenger:

Do you also have teenagers whose styling motto is: freeze to death for coolness?

Seen just now on YouTube:

I don’t think the makers of protein powder have ever had chocolate.

Spotted on Telegram:

A lot of y’all don’t understand politics because your history teacher was the football coach.

Going viral on YouTube:

Sending your selfies to NASA because you’re a star.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Blocking him isn’t enough. I want his favorite sports team to finish last every year for now and forever.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I’ll make direct eye contact while eating a hot dog, just to make you feel weird.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I’m not super into getting older but I do like how nobody asks me to help them move anymore.

It really is Monday every 15 minutes.

When I was a kid, I never expected the future to suck this much.

I love when really expensive products say, “apply generously,” like, of course, you would say that.

“What fresh hell is this?“ It’s actually the same hell as yesterday. Not fresh at all, really.

Showing your emotions to the wrong people is like bleeding next to a shark.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨