Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Looks like his wife sees the glass half empty… or in this case, the bottle half empty! 🍷😂 Maybe he should try a 'glass half full' approach next time!"

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

What electric cars and diarrhea have in common is the fear of not making it home.

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2 months ago

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That was a nice hour long Twitter scroll. Feel much worse as always. See you guys tomorrow.

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2 months ago

always, feel, guys, hour, humor, irony, media, much, nice, procrastination, scroll, self-reflection, social, social media, tomorrow, Twitter, worse
Bro, did you really just mix up e.g. and i.e. in front of the hoes?

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2 months ago

bro, e.g., front, grammar, h, humor, i.e., just, mistake, mix, mix-up
The empty side of your bed is for books and chocolate, not for liars who snore.

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2 months ago

bed, book, books, chocolate, comfort, empty, humor, liar, night, relationship, side, sleep, snore
A man’s home is his castle, but his garage is his sanctuary.

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2 months ago

castle, garage, home, humor, man, personal, personal space, sanctuary, space
I’m so desperate for a vacation that at this point I’d spend an all inclusive week at Jurassic Park.

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2 months ago

adventure, all inclusive, desperation, escape, humor, ID, inclusive, jurassic, Jurassic Park, park, point, spend, theme, theme park, travel, vacation, week

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

10 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Overheard a baby crying in the grocery store the other day so I went over and joined him. I get it, little dude, life is hard.

14 shares on Messenger this month:

‘You’re going to die alone!’ Okay, when did dying become a group project?

68 shares on X this month:

You know you’re getting older when you keep asking “Why do they have to make the instructions so small?”

45 shares on Pinterest this month:

I hate it when I go to hug someone sexy and hit my head on the mirror.

43 shares on X this month:

We are gathered here today because our ancestors didn’t have condoms.

15 shares on Snapchat this month:

Always remember you’re someone’s reason to smile. Because you’re a joke.

34 shares on X this month:

That was pointless, we could’ve just stayed strangers.

93 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I can handle most things in life, but hearing people chew isn’t one of them.

17 shares on Instagram this month:

Life tip: If all of your bathrooms are full and you’re waiting for someone to finish, just turn off the WiFi in the house.

47 shares on Snapchat this month:

I just want a bar where I can pour my own drink, have music at a normal volume, and there are no people, and it’s my house.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇸 has shared:

The best part of the relationship is before you meet them, and you’re single.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has downloaded:

You got a better chance getting chased by a dog than by me.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

You know that tingly little feeling you get when you like someone? That’s common sense leaving your body.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has viewed:

The sun really clocks out for the day before I do. That’s insane.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has bookmarked:

Sorry I was late, I was frantically applying to other jobs.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has bookmarked:

Sorry for widening my eyes and whispering “The prophecy” when we first met.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

I don’t text. I will contact you telepathically.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has downloaded:

Showering at night is so sexy and clean and self-care vibes. Showering in the morning is so productivity core, cog in the machine core.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has downloaded:

Sometimes I look deep into my colleagues’ eyes to check if you really can’t see the back of their skulls.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

We used to burn CDs like we were running an underground record label.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Slack:

Why do they call it a garage sale instead of a garbage sale?

Seen just now on TikTok:

The good old days, when you didn’t have to charge your watch and it didn’t constantly remind you how fat you were.

Seen just now on Slack:

We could all be hibernating right now but noooooo we have to be “adults” with “responsibilities”.

Spotted on X:

Staring at the sky for answers, nothing new.

Seen just now on Facebook:

If you think nobody cares about you, try missing a couple of payments.

Going viral on Twitch:

Born to be a hater, forced to understand your perspective.

Just landed via Messenger:

I’m at that point on a Monday where no.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Be the reason someone smiles today. Or blocks you. Whatever.

Just landed via Facebook:

Bedrotting is so nice. Just lying in bed, using your phone comfortably.

Spotted on Reddit:

I’m only an introvert until I meet people worth extroverting with.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

My wife asked me why the bottle of wine we bought yesterday was half empty. I said because she is a pessimist.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

What electric cars and diarrhea have in common is the fear of not making it home.

That was a nice hour long Twitter scroll. Feel much worse as always. See you guys tomorrow.

Bro, did you really just mix up e.g. and i.e. in front of the hoes?

The empty side of your bed is for books and chocolate, not for liars who snore.

A man’s home is his castle, but his garage is his sanctuary.

I’m so desperate for a vacation that at this point I’d spend an all inclusive week at Jurassic Park.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨