I won’t be doing Dry January, because who was there for me during the happy times and the hard times? Not broccoli. Posted onMay 6, 2026 by slickboy in Funny Quotes 💾 Save Image Commentary:Can't imagine broccoli being there to listen to my life story at 2 AM 🍷😂🥦 Related funny posts 🤝 Why is sugar SO addictive, and broccoli is just like, “I’ll be here when you need me” Don’t ever get excited if your kid likes a new food. They won’t like it tomorrow. Why can’t Chinese restaurants chop the broccoli in their dishes? I feel like I’m trying to fit an entire bonsai tree into my mouth. I like when the rain is misty and you get to feel like a grocery store broccoli for a little while. I wonder how many different vegetables they exploded before they discovered popcorn.