If someone drunk texts you, appreciate it. They’ve thought of you when they can barely think straight.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has downloaded:

How silly of me to forget that I am the love of my life.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has bookmarked:

At least 80% of my day is spent holding back my inappropriate thoughts.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has shared:

The way Christmas shopping expects me to have money right now is, honestly, disrespectful.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has shared:

Show me another rule so I can break that one too.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

Many men also have a walk-in closet. For them, it’s just called a floor.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has shared:

My husband is the do-it-yourself type. I asked him to take out the garbage and he said, “do it yourself.”

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

I’m a fully functional adult with the energy levels of a hibernating bear.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has copied:

I refuse to learn the color coding for heart emojis. Your heart means what I want it to, and vice versa.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

That drum solo from In the Air Tonight, but it’s me just slapping my tummy, waiting for the microwave to beep.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

The older I get, the more I walk like Charlie Chaplin.