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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇼 has downloaded:

I hope “be the light you want to see in the world” doesn’t refer to Molotov Cocktails.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has downloaded:

11 out of 10 women are always right.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has bookmarked:

What an embarrassing time to be alive.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has viewed:

What is the morning wood equivalent for women, and why do I always have it?

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

Any room can be an escape room when you have diarrhea.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has bookmarked:

Being too stressed isn’t good for the baby. I’m not pregnant though, it’s just that I’m the baby.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has viewed:

The problem with “treat yourself” is that I don’t know how to stop. I had a bad day in March, and I’ve been treating myself ever since.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has viewed:

I don’t think anything good will ever happen again until people feel bad about being stupid again.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

Using a remote to type on a keyboard on the TV is truly one of the worst human experiences that we endure.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has copied:

Caffeine isn’t cutting it anymore. I need to eat a gun.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

233 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,502

Funny Quotes Topics

17,569

Funny Quotes Images

15,502

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,365

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Discord:

Stop blaming yourself for your failures. Learn astrology and blame the planets.

Just shared via Slack:

“You handled it so well.” Nah, I didn’t. I lost my spark, felt crazy, distanced myself from everyone, and hated myself.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

If you can’t laugh at yourself, I will.

Just landed via Messenger:

I have the bruises of a much more active person.

Just shared via Facebook:

With age comes wisdom. And digestive trouble.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

“Listen to your body!” Okay, well, my body wants to lay down and eat snacks all day.

Making waves on Reddit:

Y’all ever postpone an outfit? Like, nah, let me save this for a better day? Same.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

American homes are so strange because, why is your front door in the living room?

Going viral on X:

I’m just here to make you wish I wasn’t.

Going viral on Snapchat:

I brake for no one, except squirrels.

If you say something while exhaling smoke, it is 10 times more profound.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"When I blow out birthday candles, I become a philosopher. 🎂💨🤔"

comedy, exaggeration, humor, humor style, humorous, humorous observation, irony, observation, sarcasm, satire, say, smoke, smoking, something, style, times, while, wit

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Nothing humbles me faster than my phone camera accidentally turning on.

0

2 months ago

accidental, accidental photo, accidentally, camera, embarrassment, faster, humor, me, nothing, phone, phone camera, photo, selfie, surprise, technology, turning
Tupperware is a fun way to store your leftovers until you throw them away.

0

2 months ago

food, food storage, fun, humor, kitchen, leftover, storage, store, throwaway, Tupperware
AirBnB is fun for when you want to be financially abused by a stranger with a binder filled with rules.

0

2 months ago

abuse, Airbnb, experience, filled, financial, financial abuse, fun, humor, lodging, rules, stranger, travel, want
Really miss the drama of being able to angrily shut a flip phone.

0

5 months ago

able, anger, being, drama, flip, flip phone, frustration, humor, miss, nostalgia, phone, shut
Once you realize I’m an idiot, my posts start to make a lot more sense.

0

2 months ago

humor, idiot, posts, realization, realize, self-deprecation, sense, start, understanding
Never let your job prevent you from acting unemployed.

0

2 months ago

acting, comedy, humor, job, let, motivation, never, prevent, unemployed, unemployment, work

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

38 shares on X this month:

The problem with self-checkout is that all the cashiers are idiots.

100 shares on Slack this month:

Forget tagging friends, I want to be able to tag my enemies.

46 shares on X this month:

In every imagination I have pictured myself in, I’m never poor.

48 shares on Discord this month:

Shout-out to my embarrassingly squeaky ass bed frame that makes me sound more popular than I actually am to my neighbors.

30 shares on Telegram this month:

We should just cancel April Fools Day this year. No prank can top reality right now.

65 shares on Facebook this month:

Sorry I missed your call. I saw that you were calling and immediately threw my phone into an active volcano.

59 shares on WeChat this month:

Hate when people ask “why is it called Silence of the Lambs?” Like, did you hear any lambs during the movie? Use your head!

77 shares on YouTube this month:

My wife rearranged the kitchen cabinets, and now I’ll never eat again.

65 shares on Snapchat this month:

It got weird when I thought both arm rests at the movie theatre were mine.

87 shares on YouTube this month:

I get real disrespectful with serving sizes. A bag is not gonna tell me what to do.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇬 has bookmarked:

Whispering to paramedic before I pass out: save me, but not enough that I have to go to work tomorrow.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has viewed:

Turns out “YouTube rabbit hole” is not a reliable science degree.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

We should just cancel April Fools Day this year. No prank can top reality right now.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

Remember: no matter what anyone else thinks of you, it’s how you delude yourself that matters.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has copied:

Why do humans need jobs? Why can’t I just exist and make art and chill with my cat?

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

Please don’t ask me what my hobbies are, I lost interest in life back in 6th grade.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has copied:

Sorry I said your toddler should be in commercials for birth control.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has viewed:

Go ahead and use that semi-colon; no one will know you’re doing it wrong.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has shared:

Haircuts should be covered by insurance.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has viewed:

Our parents just don’t know how far we rode them bikes when we were younger.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on TikTok:

They monitor me harder than Britney Spears around here.

Just landed via YouTube:

“You just want an easy life.” Should I want a difficult one?

Just landed via Messenger:

I hate being at the age where you feel obligated to buy your whole family gifts for Christmas, but also the age where your bank account doesn’t feel obligated to support that.

Trending via Slack:

I keep pressing the space bar, but I’m still on Earth.

Going viral on Telegram:

One of the worst ways to waste your youth is by being insecure.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Statistically, 6 out of 7 dwarfs aren’t happy.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

God, is there anything worse than when someone wants to show you a video?

Freshly posted on Instagram:

I love the idea of a fruitarian, just morally affronted that anyone could eat a baby spinach.

Breaking via Twitch:

I’m going to try and be less of a people pleaser, is everyone ok with that?

Going bananas on Facebook:

The first time you forgive out of love. The second time out of hope and the third time out of stupidity.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

If you say something while exhaling smoke, it is 10 times more profound.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Nothing humbles me faster than my phone camera accidentally turning on.

Tupperware is a fun way to store your leftovers until you throw them away.

AirBnB is fun for when you want to be financially abused by a stranger with a binder filled with rules.

Really miss the drama of being able to angrily shut a flip phone.

Once you realize I’m an idiot, my posts start to make a lot more sense.

Never let your job prevent you from acting unemployed.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨