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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇪 has viewed:

Everyone thinks they’re brave right up until a goose starts chasing them.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has shared:

Dear sleep: thanks for trying, but you can’t beat surfing the net.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

Girls know how to flirt until it’s with someone they actually like.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has shared:

In my 20s: I’m gonna live forever! In my 40s: uh oh!

Someone from 🇩🇰 has downloaded:

Welcome to your 40s, you now don’t understand a single word anyone under 25 is saying.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has downloaded:

I was going to warn my kids about the repercussions of drugs and alcohol until I realized that they in fact were the repercussions of drugs and alcohol.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has copied:

People need to understand the difference between want and need. Like, I want abs, but I need chocolate.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has downloaded:

Gonna run this by my two best friends who are as insane as I am.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

You know that moment when you get up in the morning, you’re full of energy and you can’t wait to get to work? Me neither!

Someone from 🇯🇲 has shared:

Adulthood is saying “but after this week things will slow down a bit” over and over until you die.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

800 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,962

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,962

Updated

26 minutes ago

Users Online

3,436

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Discord:

Establish dominance at work by telling your coworkers they look tired before they get a chance to say it to you.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Returning to Twitter is like coming back to a dysfunctional family.

Just shared via Reddit:

Old and bitter feels much better than I thought it would.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

If I say “First of all,” run away, because I have prepared research, data, charts and I will totally prove you wrong.

Breaking via YouTube:

Great news everyone! The priest who took my confession is expected to make a full recovery.

Spotted on WeChat:

How many times does one have to open the fridge door before cake appears inside?

Broadcasted on WeChat:

To the spirits in my walls: going to the store, be right back.

Just landed via Reddit:

Wolves should really raise more people.

Just shared via WeChat:

My boyfriend is mad at me because I keep replying with a fire extinguisher emoji to every girl that comments with a flame emoji on his pictures.

Spotted on YouTube:

I hate when my kids ask me impossible questions like: What day is it?

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Funny animal comparison quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

800 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,962

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,962

Updated

26 minutes ago

Users Online

3,445

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇭 has viewed:

Blocking isn’t enough, I hope your pillow never has a cold side.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has bookmarked:

“I asked ChatGPT.” “I asked Grok.” Yeah, well, I just analyzed it from a Marxist perspective, and it was pretty obvious.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has viewed:

Do other people remember toasters with wings flying across our computer screens or was that a fever dream I just had?

Someone from 🇹🇴 has viewed:

For a girl that loves sleep and hates stress, my career choice is questionable.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has downloaded:

I feel bad for Slash. He bought a goofy hat in like 1986 and now he has to wear it until the day he dies.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has downloaded:

You can’t scare me; you’re not my credit card bill.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

Ain’t nothing better than knowing you were right when everyone else thought you were crazy.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has shared:

It’s so cold outside I saw a gangster pull his pants up and walk stiffly.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has shared:

Brave of you to assume you can resist my good looks.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has viewed:

Legos are too expensive nowadays. They should go back to costing as much as they did when my parents paid for them.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Pitching a sitcom where all the top people running a major city have been arrested and by chain of command the person in charge is now a librarian.

Spotted on Slack:

If my dog knew how many photos I have of him sleeping, he’d file a restraining order against me.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

I don’t think humans were put on this earth to know what Salesforce is. It’s unnatural.

Trending via Threads:

Going to bed early is easy, going to sleep early is a whole other set of problems.

Spotted on Messenger:

My problem areas are my upper arms and earth.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Neighbors are fighting. Can I knock on the wall and ask them to speak up so I know whose side I’m on?

Reported on YouTube:

Does anyone else feel like their brain has a hundred tabs open at once?

Live now on Twitch:

“Huh” is 94% of my vocabulary.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Everyone thinks they’re a badass until seaweed brushes their leg.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

We should put a tariff on being mean to me.

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