56 funny fantasy quotes - Wordgag

A girl like me should be in the sky, sitting on a star.

May 30, 2026

Everyday I wait for a vampire to seduce me.

May 29, 2026

Fantasizing about you fantasizing about me.

May 29, 2026

Such is modern life. Mordor in our midst.

May 29, 2026

A degree in international law is about as real as a degree in Dothraki.

May 29, 2026

Not being able to teleport is a huge inconvenience for me.

May 29, 2026

As a girl, I should be allowed to speak to the moon directly.

May 28, 2026

Sharks are orcs, dolphins are elves.

May 28, 2026

Probably always gonna be the weirdo that believes in magic.

May 28, 2026

I’m a simple girl, really. I just want to watch the sunset, laugh, drink coffee, and read books. I also want a time machine and a pet dragon.

May 28, 2026

You can tell it’s desperate times the way spam messages have gone from fantasies like ‘I am a prince and I want to give you money’ to ‘I am an HR manager and I have a real job for you!’

May 28, 2026

I used to mix Mountain Dew with the cheapest vodka I could find, and I called it the Blood of Mannaroth because it’s green and turns you into an orc.

May 28, 2026

The streets are not for me. I belong in an enchanted forest, eating berries, and talking to my animal friends.

May 27, 2026

Will mosquitoes ever develop a pizza obsession and end their pursuit of human blood?

May 27, 2026

Take me down to the Moria city, where the girls are green and the boys are stinky… and even Gandalf said ‘Nope, too freaky!’

May 27, 2026

If a portal opened up in front of me, I’d go in—no questions asked.

May 27, 2026

The best way to contact me is to meet me in my dreams at 3 a.m.

May 27, 2026

I wish every day had 30,000 hours, and that I had unlimited Adderall and was unemployed.

May 27, 2026

I deserve a dragon after all I’ve been through.

May 26, 2026

I will not hesitate to use dark magic on you.

May 26, 2026

My knight in shining armor comes in liquid form.

May 25, 2026

I love all mythical creatures. Vampires, werewolves, unicorns, kids who listen.

May 25, 2026

An adventure and a dragon would cure me.

May 25, 2026

Once I find a dragon, y’all are toast.

May 25, 2026

My biggest sexual fantasy is someone throwing a million dollars on my naked body and then leaving me alone.

May 24, 2026

Born to be a Jedi spinning a lightsaber, forced to work full-time and pay rent.

May 24, 2026

If I was a mythical creature, I’d be a Sighclops.

May 24, 2026

“AI is coming for your jobs!” I’d like to see AI send 5 emails a day and check their fantasy football line-ups on and off for 8 hours.

May 23, 2026

The house from Hansel and Gretel but made out of tacos.

May 23, 2026

People complain about jury duty as if listening to true crime all day and being sequestered at night isn’t secretly every mother’s fantasy.

May 23, 2026

On my way to Mordor. You nerds need anything?

May 23, 2026

Lie about the gap in your resume. Tell them you had to help some Hobbits take a ring to Mordor or something.

May 22, 2026

I asked my boyfriend if he believed in trolls and elves and he said, “slightly.”

May 22, 2026

Video games are great. They let you try out your craziest fantasies. For example, on The Sims, you can have a job and a house.

May 22, 2026

According to “The Hobbit”, Gollum was once a handsome young man who was robbed of his youth, zest for life and energy by putting on a ring. Men, think about it!

May 22, 2026

I haven’t given up on my fairy-tale ending. I still plan to be eaten by a wolf.

May 22, 2026

Frodo is a beautiful name for a boy. Has a ring to it.

May 22, 2026

Can we talk about what little red riding hoods actual grandma must have looked like?

May 21, 2026

The Sims fulfills the millennial fantasy of being able to afford a house in a walkable neighborhood on the salary of a professional carrot peeler.

May 21, 2026

In an alternate universe, sex dreams of me.

May 21, 2026